Things you hate IV

There's absolutely no point unless you grow something over it. But that's what you are supposed to do, isn't it? Do many people have one of these 'bare'?

 

I was very proud of mine and I grew a couple of grape vines up it. Looked really great and nice thing to sit under to eat lunch on a sunny day - my little garden's at that time's in full sun. We had a very long break (well two fortnights) one summer (I had loads of leave to use up) and came back to find the local starlings had moved their roost to my pergola (with built in food source). Their month's worth of guano had pretty much rotted the whole structure (it was held in place by the vines), the wooden 'designer' furniture (the covers appeared to have rotted through pretty much instantaneously) and the decking was too pitted to be safely used.

 

Were they starlings or aliens with acid for droppings?

 

We bought an aluminum pegola at our last house with a retractable canopy as the patio was away from the house and it gave us options for shade/no shade. It was the cheapest practical option.

Oh and, I **** you not, that pegola is the only thing I've ever answered a question on Amazon about!

 

Or jealous neighbours.

 

You see, I get that with a canopy for shade or sa BHW said with a vine for cover. That's all good.

It's when they just have the bare pergola I don't get.

 

I don't get that either. I can only suggest that those doing this (and I must say I have never seen it) have no conception of its proper use.

 

Sometimes a bare pergola can seem as effective as any other intervention even though it’s providing no actual benefit. This is known as the Gazebo Effect.

 

Potential.

Decking is also pointless. Slippery when wet, home for rats and is just *****.

 

Pergolas do have a function even if they don’t have anything growing on them, if they’re placed at the correct angle relative to the sun and the beams are thick enough, then they’ll cast shadow at varying degrees throughout the day. So they’ll provide some shade and at times full shade as well as a nice breeze and so forth, but without blocking the sun out completely.

The problem is most people don’t put them up at the right angle so it renders the benefit pointless.

 

****tards in the park who:

A) ignore the signs asking people to NOT feed the birds

B) Throw food into the grass right where you are lying and enjoying the sunshine, meaning that a flock of pigeons descends around you, forcing you to move elsewhere

******* idiots

 

Nah, my decking has revolutionised my outdoor space. It's brought the back garden up to the height of the house and i can pop out there barefoot in summer, especially during lockdown and I'm wfh. It joins the garden up with the house.

There are bait traps underneath so the rats can pop in and then **** off home and die.

 

Back in the day if I wanted to wash my windscreen when driving I'd squirt the screen then turn on the wipers. Now that's impossible without the bloody wipers starting up, meaning sometimes they wipe sh*t across the screen before the water hits meaning a big sh*tty mess.

Then they stay on for 3 wipes.

Why?

 

The ridiculous lack of communication between the people that run the generic sports coaches used in most primary schools.
One of the little lads in my groups had a fall at school and needed four stitches in his knee.
The doctor told his mum he was to do no sport for two weeks.
The young sap that took his class at school made him do some boot camp lesson despite William protesting and his knee split open and more stitches were required.
Apparently the previous sports coach had not told the new recruit about Will's condition.
There was no teacher or TA present either which surprised me.
The coach has been withdrawn for the time being but the schools were advised to use ngb providers when this scheme began about eight years ago.
They select the multi sports option as they are much cheaper.
You get what you pay for and who suffers,the children.
Most of these 'coaches' that I've seen are still in their teens and very raw.
I don't blame them but the people who set up the companies and then cream off the profits.
Having said that tennis can hardly claim the moral high ground given some of the half wits we have.

 

Your (reading) glasses are dirty.

You clean them.

You put them back on.

Your glasses are still dirty.

 

Maybe it’s your eyeballs?

 

Would it help if everyone wrote in a bigger font size?

 

The most annoying thing is people writing in a big font size so you have to keep scrolling.

 

I tell you what gets me.

People on here who have absolutely massive signatures. I have to scroll for ages to get past it.

 

Click on your user name top right and choose ‘preferences’ from the menu.

Uncheck this box:



Never see a signature again.

 

You superstar. Thanks!

 

Sainsburys "25% off when you buy 6 bottles or more".
Just checked out on £194 inc 15 bottles. Damn you Sainsburys, you are turning me into an alcoholic/bottle hoarder.

 

Don’t worry, we took on a 2nd unit at work recently at it’s got a bit of a rabbit warren of offices and storage areas. Anyways, the lady in charge of managing our sample products for laminate flooring finishes has stashed (at my count) 156 bottles in the racking. Her garage must be fit to burst if she’s extended to her workplace. Un-*******-believable.

 

You’re fooling no one, @Filbert.

 

If I allowed myself access to that amount of wine I’d be hospitalised within a week. Find the stuff rather moreish.

 

I hope they're kept at a constant temperature of around 13 oC and a relative humidity of 20% or those screw top 'wines' won't be at their best when you hold your next oenophile event.

 

Oooh la la! Catty.

I had to google oenophile.....

 

Those awful, fake social media videos, which are usually either a prank, where the victim is obviously in on it and fakes surprise, or where they scroll through 8 minutes of hand written signs to reveal they know the other person is cheating.

It's a product of a world where being 'tiktok famous' is a genuine aspiration.

 

The end of lockdown .

Because it means the morons and boy racers (or girl) are back on the roads again .

 

Wanting to be "tiktok famous"... Ugh. How can we respect these people if they don't respect themselves?

A friend of mine from uni told me that when he was doing his GCSE's, the teacher went around the class once, asking everyone what they wanted to be.

One girl (with complete sincerity) said "a WAG".

No words.

 

'Street' dance.

 

Wait until you see the sequel- Streetdance 2: Electric Boogaloo

 

M40 yesterday four high performance cars were racing, a Ferrari, a Porsche, an Aston and one other. Weaving in and out, then they slowed up and when the lanes were clearer drag raced from 70.

I saw ahead they all left at the next junction. Likely to rejoin and do it all again.

Walking around where we live after 8pm no end of serious speeding. Often see people doing 50-60 on 30 roads.

Shoot them all I say.

 

What don’t you like about it? Is it blocking the traffic?

 

Adults in tracksuits doing cartwheels and pretending to be robots....
I'm taking up Morris dancing, by the way