Real People With Amusing Names

Recently, I have been dealing with:

Tobias Fuhrer and Bjoern Titz. A Norwegian colleague told me that Bjoern/Bjorn is Scandi for Bear. This made me larf alot.

I once attended a conference in Houston where Welcome Bender was also in attendance. At the airport was a large Hertz car rental/taxi sign being held up with Welcome Bender on it. God, did I larf.

Hi. I'm John Smith.
Welcome Bender.
Fight ensues.

There is also Prof. Dr. Erich E. W@nker and his W@nker Lab in Berlin. I assume he hasn't been invited to give a seminar in the UK.

Pure comedy gold.

 

My wife's got a friend called Tanya Hampton

 

Well hello. Splendid.

 

There was an Ariel Bender in Mott the Hoople but that wasn’t his real name.

 

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tiny_Kox

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/D1ck_trickle

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Randy_Baumgardner




Skooks Pong

 

Looking up colleagues names in the Dutch office was always a bit of a giggle. I particularly remember Dirk Donker, Watze Hilarius, **** Slot and Joost van der does de Willebois

 

https://web.archive.org/web/20040929115630/http://www.electraisd.net:80/alumni/1993_seniors.htm

 

Hotel lifts made by Schindlers always makes me laugh

(back when there were hotels and people could stay in them…)

 

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Nonce
LA Hip-Hop combo from the 90s.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Robert_Taylor_(actor)
Born 'Spangler Arlington Brugh'

 

Yes, I used to work with a Freek D1cks.

When I left uni I worked in a bank for a bit and remember some funny customer names. A woman called Lettuce Plant was one. There was also one called James Onions with absolutely no apostrophe. If anyone called him Onions he’d go mental and say it was oh-ny-ons, like hyacinth bucket. There was also a bender but I can’t remember his first name.

 

My Mrs in Norwegian and always has a giggle when we play Boremuff. A certain Steve Cook sounds very similar to Stiv Kuk in Norwegian. Translated back to English is Stiff C o c k .

 

There's a chap I regularly email back and forth with a dutch surname of van dik. Probably as common as Smith is here, but it always makes me smile.

I also can't help smirking whenever I see a fridge with "Smeg" in big letters across the front. I have always hoped they keep semen samples in such a fridge somewhere!

 

One of my first jobs was on the help desk for a finance company.

The names I remember fondly are Ethelred Plunkett and an old couple whose preferred names were Fanny and D1ck.

 

At my last employment one of my company's clients had a chap called Tudor King, I wonder if he had a brother called Stuart.

 

I still can’t believe Wolfsburg had Wolfgang Wolf as manager.

 

Jizz Van Hornkamp
Quim

 

I taught a student once called Ke Wang. He was Chinese and the names are reversed. He informed us that 'Ke' was pronounced 'Kerr'.

 

I work with a guy with the first name of "Dragon". Awesome name.

 

I bet your fees robbed them Hannover fist.

 

Schick/Holes combining well for The Czech Republic at Hampden Park this afternoon

 

I have cousins called Rainbow, Tree, Jubilee and Rain. They were, not surprisingly born in a hippy commune in the 70's

 

Would never have guessed, to be honest!

 

Having Rainbow and Rain must have been confusing!

 

You don’t get one without the other.

 

On a footballing theme, former Spurs boss Martin Jol has brothers D1ck and C 0ck.

 

View attachment 6551

 

These never get old…

 

Surprise, surprise! In a work e-mail, Dame Cilla Snowball is going to be chairing a discussion on diversity.

 

I knew of someone called Maria C u n t o. Even more astoundingly, she was formerly a sex & relationships education advisor in Bedfordshire. A mental health support officer, also in the Beds area was Dee Press. Both are true! I had to introduce Maria at a conference once. I only used her first name...

As we know, Bedfordshire can be an odd place.

 

In popular culture, hearing **** Pound’s name always raised a smile.

I had a meeting once with a guy called Tony Cheese. Simple but effective in the humour stakes.

There’s also a master chocolatier in Belgium called Eddy Von Tittelboom.

 

Went to school with a Mike Hunt… now say it fast

 

Was once on a conference call with a chap called Randy Handcock. One of my previous firms had an online directory with someone called Robert Sherunkle on it though I'm sure that was an IT pisstake.