[NOT HAPPENING] Mario Balotelli

Apparently taken near Oxford Street this morning...could be something in this.

 

Lovis Veste, Haivis’s wayward brother.

 

https://www.dailymail.co.uk/sport/f...alotelli-way-England-Watford-linked-move.html

8 kilos overweight so ideal for the Deeney role.

 

Blimey, are we signing Phil Mitchell?

 

Break out the Bailey's, light the blue touchpaper, a front three of Penaranda, Balotelli and Success would guarantee press coverage, embarrassment and total disaster.

 

Haha where did you find this?!

 

Looks like Mr T.

 

... said many a manager over the last 10 years

 

Spooky. This just appeared in my coffee.

 

You'd put on 8kgs if you drunk that. Best to avoid.

 

If only left backs were the new right backs...

 

He'll have to beat off Floppo at the front of the buffet queue, even Deeney can't do that.

 

Can you link to the source of the photo? Then we can get the forum detectives on it, working out what café this is and who the people are next to him... This is what deadline days are made for!

Edit: old photo from 2018 article when he was discussing a move to Fiorentina. Shame on you for getting hopes up of the maddest transfer ever!

 

Look closer and you'll see a sign.

 

Lots of rumours that Besiktas are after him on Twitter.

 

How did I miss that?

 

If anything could undermine what Ivic is trying to build, then this would be right up there. I'd rather see if he could get Penaranda's career back on track. If he can't integrate him for whatever reason, what could he do with Balotelli?

 

Are Brescia trying to keep him or get rid? If they don't want him, why would we?

 

Does anyone know how his time at Nice ended? Seemed to really find some form there - 2016-2018 seems to be better than a goal every 2 games.

 

They've frozen him out from what sounds like a dispute some months ago over illness/not turning up to training.

 

Sounds like it would be better to set fire to a big pile of money (or Penaranda, I'm not fussed)

 

Interestingly seemed to have 2 good years at Nice, then couldn't be arsed for 6 months, went to Marseille and turned it on there at the start, and was picked for Italy again - Apparently 15kg overweight - so maybe 8kg isn't too bad after all.

Really seems like one who turns it on when he has a point to proof (like scoring against Nice). If he feels he has unfinished business in England then might be a quality signing. If not, Cassiobury has cancelled their firework display this year, so Mario has the floor.

 

We have some on here who still criticise Gray for his lockdown party. They’ll spontaneously combust at what Ballotelli would do.

 

I doubt it would happen. He's more than talented, even at his age - but I think he'd spend as much time in the sin bin as on the pitch. He'd gather more fouls than statues gather pigeon **** and I doubt that he could keep his temper. The Championship is just not the right league for him.

 

It would most likely be a disaster. But I'd probably start watching us again.

Pedro Balotelli Sarr would be hilarious to watch in the Championship.

 

You cant beat off a Floppo m8.

 

That's not the Balotelli I remember ? Has he had "Michael Jackson treatment" ?

 

I'm probably one of the leaders of that group - and my issue was the timing of it with trying to battle against relegation.

If Mario comes, and turns it on then I will give zero fecks about the fireworks/driving around dishing out cash/ad hoc he wants. Same with Andre - when fit again if he comes back, puts in a shift and works then no problem what he does off the pitch.

 

He generally seems to implode at least 6 months after a move. If we could get 6 good months out of him in this league he'd be quite a signing.

Not that I think this is remotely credible, mind. Only seems marginally more likely than Hell freezing over.

 

Plane Watch:

 

Private flight or a normal one.

 

JFA = Jetfly Aviation, a private flight provider.

 

Would be a mad signing, but boy wouldn't it be great if it paid off