Mrs Moose and I have a regular thing we do (stop it) which is rather sweet in its own peculiar way. When one of us makes a cup of coffee for the other we always say here’s your coffee you c*nt. This was a line in a novel we both enjoyed and it stuck. I wonder if other forum members have loving rituals or shared little jokes with their partners or spouses, that may seem unusual or eccentric, they would like to share?
I've always found breakfast in bed to be very strange. I couldn't think of anything worse but each to their own of course!
Breakfast in bed, nothing too large like a full English more toast or a bacon sarnie, on a Sunday is lovely.
‘Will you make me breakfast in bed?’ ‘No, my arms aren’t long enough’ - We both enjoy doing really stupid dances for each other and teaching each other new dance moves. - Anything with an elasticated waistband like pyjama bottoms get hoisted up to the armpits. - Argue in (a racist approximation of) a Chinese accent based on the City Wok man from South Park. A personal favourite. - Narrate the dog’s activities and inner monologue in a gruff voice. She’s a very foul mouthed and non pc dog I’m afraid to say. Only time my other half says c*nt is when the dog calls me it. - She’s a really good singer so I like making her do really over the top warbling renditions of songs. Amazing Grace is her best work.
We often do the opposite of this. If I wear trackie bottoms I’m likely to get debagged, instantly debilitating.
Mrs Jumbo says at least once each day “why are you so knobbish?”. Normally after I’ve become irritated by something minor.
I remember my Mum spelling out T W A T with my alphabites. Always the joker that woman. May I add I was around 25 and had a new girlfriend around..
Mrs Lloyd lovingly called me a 'feckless immature piece of sh1t' this morning. We use similar pet names for each other all the time
I find the greeting ritual as I awake from peaceful slumber to the warm and tender words 'Get up you lazy c**t' always sets the day up nicely.
Too many to mention. 50% of our communication takes the form of little private in-jokes and made up words/phrases which would mean absolutely nothing to anyone else. One ritual is that on Friday, Sat & Sun I need to have poured us an alcoholic drink at dead on 6pm, no prior warning or discussion. Her objective is to catch me out for missing the deadline with a look, fake dry throat cough, or subtle comment.
I’m getting a kind of David Niven at home with Audrey Hepburn vibe. Ahem, dahling, look at the time, haven’t you forgotten something?
I steal the girlfriends pillow every night and enjoy ten blissful minutes before she yanks it away from me.
In the original lockdown we got into a Saturday morning habit of ordering coffee and croissants in, then (weather permitting) sitting in the garden for an hour or two. Another thing we do is try to catch the other off guard by calling their name, then when she/I look over, it’s met with a crude hand gesture.
I have on occasions sent my Mrs suggestive photos via messenger type apps. Her reply is ohhhhh someone's horny today! I just answered sorry that was meant for your mother. Perfect just before a miserable Monday morning start at work.
Only tried this once. After a very drunken Summer night out, the Mrs had passed out naked on the bed. Bored and feeling stupid I decided to gentle a couple of my kids chocolate buttons between her cheeks. Well if you can keep the pretence up in the morning as they awake to chocolate smears over the sheets it's golden. The sheer initial shock and disgust in their face is priceless and well worth the moaning of you're not effin normal.
Au contraire. The clear advice for young people from this thread is, if things are getting stale or fraught, try calling your partner a rude name.
I’m reminded for no good reason of Harry Hill’s line, My father used to like my mother to get dressed up as a nurse. Pulls suggestive face, raised eyebrow etc… Spoiler: Punchline Then he used to like her to go out to work… as a nurse and bring in some extra money.
It does rather suggest that a number of posters on this forum are in fact engaged in an intense physical relationship outside of this forum. For example, it's pretty clear from recent posts that @lowerrous and @Burnsy are at it....
Agreed my Parents were married well over 50 years and those two were forever at each other. My mum who purposely changed the sugar bowl contents with salt for an early morning cuppa for my Dad. So many times he got caught out he decided to drink it without sugar eventually. The best one was on my Dads 50th. She had bought flowers and a card for him but had gotten one of her friends to write it and pretend that it was a secret admirer. It's the only time I saw her acting skills fail her as she burst out laughing to his stumbling cries of denial. I went night fishing only to find she'd superglued my tackle box lid. It was an absolute mare sometimes.
Lol no it was always out of love and to put smiles on faces. Trust me he got her good and proper too. For instance once she got her first mobile phone I'd use other people's phones to send messages like. I know where you live, I'm watching you etc etc. It's in house warped humour that occurred.
