Bargain Hunt

Sarky: Do you like it or not?
Red Numpty: Not a huge fan. No.
Sarky: No?
Red Numpty: Not for me.
Sarky: No, I thought it might not, because this is quality.

Maybe you'll sink without trace, he opines when they panic buy the oars.

 

More (alot more) of Lynda Bellingham.

 

Sweeney! Lobby card and the usual dodgy inducements from the 70s. I suspect that said spread will just be screengrabs from the aforementioned film.
Rings on her fingers, perhaps not. Coins in their pockets, not after this hasty purchase.

 

Tash definitely bigger in this episode.

 

The Brassy Birds comment on the Brassy Birds.

 

BBC approved preamble:
Newark 24
Series 67
https://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/m001xgmh
The reds and blues are dressed for success, but who will go home with the most money? Experts Mark Stacey and Catherine Southon are on hand to help. Flamboyant frills, huge collars and puffed sleeves are the hallmarks of Tudor tailoring, and in this episode, Natasha meets historical costumier Ninya Mikhaila to learn about 16th-century fashions. Together, they unwrap a genuine Farthingale sleeve to see how it was made. Historic items are also on the shopping lists of both teams at Newark antiques fair. Car sales executives Sam and Jake are the red team and they reckon 'negotiation is the key'. In blue are Sheffield sister act Sharon and Jackie, who optimistically hope to 'make profits on every item'. As the clock ticks down, Jake picks up a pottery dog, but Sam spots a chip on the poor pooch’s head. Over with the blues, the sisters hope to get a pair of Victorian nail scissors for a snip, but expert Catherine Southon isn’t convinced. There are plenty of profits at Colin Young’s sale in Grantham, but will anyone go home with a golden gavel?

The Translation:
Sounds like another episode where the cast are let loose with the BH fancy dress box. A few costume changes to paper over the paucity in Production Budget. At least it's not at another racecourse but at Newark Antiques Fair where an ever expanding Tash will be tearing herself away from her Pickled Onion and Banana cravings to be propped up by Randy Catherine and Sarky Marky. Who will go home with the most money or more accurately who will go home with Gropey Southon and who will end up in Sarky's sinister attic dressed up as one of the Twins from The Shining. Evidently, the Reds and Blues are dressed for success. Success? Not at Godawful, Dung & Miser they're not. Plenty of profits at Rick Wakeman's sale they say, well that would be a first.

​

The Staff:
[Gaffer] Strict Natasha Raskin Sharp, Glasgow Southside enforcer
[Red Team Expert] Sarky Marky Stacey, the sleazy, slurry somnambulist, he has been known to enjoy a pansy
[Blue Team Expert] Catherine Southon, super dull, super useless, super randy
[Auctioneer] Colin Rick Wakeman Young, Your Clutter Our Future
[Auction Location] Golding Young & Mawer, Lincs
[Miserlin Rating] Approved

The Teams:
[Red Team] Car sales executives Sam and Jake, Arthur Daley's relations continue the tradition of log book tampering, MOT fraud and industrial scale clocking. Another nice little earner.
(Challenge: Piece of signed pottery)
[Blue Team] Sheffield sister act Sharon and Jackie, who have taken a day off from the convent to sadistically punish Catholic schoolchildren.
(Challenge: Piece of hallmarked jewellery)

The Shopping:
Reds: Wooden nutcracker (9) OK, Lorna Bailey signed pottery dodo (99 Challenge) OKish, Vintage wooden oars (10) OK.
Blues: Doggie brooch, not Dogging, Catherine (2) Bargain, 9ct gold Cabochon Agate ring (55 Challenge) OK, Bronze stalk sculpture, not Stalk-on, so Gropey sad (200) Ouch, ooof, aaaarrrggghhhhh.

The Distraction:
Tash discovers the delightful Fartingale, a bird that could pass wind so tunefully. The creature's diet was developed for it to generate as much excess gas as possible without it defecating everywhere or expiring due to chronic dehydration. She later t1t's around with some sleeves.

​

The Auction:
Reds: Wooden nutcracker (9 profit), Lorna Bailey signed pottery dodo (51 profit) GG definitely on, Vintage wooden oars (5 profit) GG confirmed.
Sarky's BB are a pair of Silver, Glass and Leather Hip flasks (50), 60-90, 32. Surprisingly makes a loss.

​

Blues: Doggie brooch (28 profit) Bargain, 9ct gold Cabochon Agate ring (15 loss), Bronze stalk sculpture, not Stalk-on, so Gropey sad (115 loss).
Gropey's BB is a Victorian Gold, turquoise and Amethyst propelling pencil (28), 25-40, 30. A small profit but it was unlucky not to make more.

​

The Aftermath:
A very pregnant Tash. Sarky on great form again with some classic one-liners. Catherine not trusted with the beardy blokes, her randy-vous thwarted, so she gets the hot flush duo on the Blue Team. Tash doing loads of poking during the Distraction. Rick Wakeman Auction, the fastest Dutch Auction in the West. Catherine's Blues were on first. Never a good sign. The Dog brooch, which they got for a steal, made an excellent profit, so you do wonder if there were big losses incoming. The Agate ring could have gone either way. However, it Yanged rather than Yinged and made a loss. Then it was the big risk Bronze, which Grabby did warn them about, but also filled their heads with golden cascades of cash that had them filling their bladder pants up to bursting. It got to about halfway and then crumbled to dust with a big 115 loss. About par for Catherine. Her BB was a nice propelling pencil, which only made a 2 note profit, it should have made more but the skinflints didn't shift. A huge clunking 3-figure 100 GBP deficit for them. So Sarky's Reds are on last so you guess that they're going to end the programme on a high. The treen made a profit as expected and then came the big risk, big spend, Dodo. The internet loved it and it sold for 150. A big profit. Then it was their Panicky last buy, the wooden oars, which they did get quite cheaply, so there was decent hope. They made a small profit, and that rare think happened, a Golden Gavel was obtained at the Miserlings Loath Lincs Lair. Sarky produced a couple of decent hip flasks for his BB which Colin enthusiastically valued assuming an easy profit. No profits are easy here and a surprising yet unsurprising loss resulted. They still end with 47 notes to add to the Golden Gavel, so not a bad day's work. Entertaining episode.

​

The Hi-Kick:
Standard indoor kick. Very pregnant Tash still manages to get her leg up early and above 90 but she's beaten this time by one of the Red Blokes who almost boots his own head off. Sarky barks out YES!!!!!!, as it's the first time in ages that he's managed to raise his leg horizontally without defecating himself. Everyone else hits par bar Catherine who puts all her effort into making sure she doesn't wobble and pull the whole chain of them down. Yes, YES!!

​

 

Perhaps they too had earlier been watching 'Sexier Lulu' in Homes Under The Hammer - and had got The Boat That I Row stuck in their minds?

p.s. Very lookeylikey here:

 

Blimey!!
Her Oxo cubes have certainly not dissolved.

 

Reminds us of a great derby: Club vs Club International

 

Loved her in the mid-70s frippery Cuckoo Waltz:

 

Although still not as porky as Sarky..

 

but are still making us produce gravy

 

Saturday lunchtime...
Today's episode features two especially useless and unattractive all-female teams, blundering about unprofitably; both the Reds and the Blues look like amateurs and...yes, it's the wimmin's FA Cup.

 

You make a couple of good points

 

No hunt today.

Fumin'

 

Trimmed McWitch episode for today (Sun). Somebody in the editorial team managed to trim off 15 mins of Bagpipes, McWitch false laughing, and her rendition of Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious, which is still being recited by her in real time as we speak.

 

Anita Manning hosts Paul Laidlaw and John Cameron.

A rare treat; usually have to watch 'Roadtrip' to see him in action

 

'I want to smash it!" yelps Bluebloke in front of mildy pretty Redbird.
In your dreams, mate.
Anita enthusiastically tossing a huge dark caber - not for the first time, I bet.

Lovely writing slope.
Oh, the good old pre-keyboard days...

Blokes cannot help stopping to play a game. Proper lad behaviour.

 

Redbird straightens hair and ladles on mascara for auction, and thereby adds a tenner to her value, imho. Shades of a saucy young Alison Steadman*.

*"Is it real silver?
Yeah. Silver plate, yeah."

 

Some unexpected results today...
Cameron's Banana Split smile wider than ever.

 

I watched the full fat 45 version earlier, so my comments are based on that. The skimmed version that was on today, missed out a few points of interest.

Anything for a Pound.



Making your own gin isn't a craft, it's a necessity in Sweatyland. Making your own candles comes in handy if you've been on the gin and are feeling a bit lonely.

McWitch was sporty. When she was younger she excelled at broomstick flying and toad sourcing/saucing and in later years has been a much indemand urban curling stone, where she's placed on a coastered table and pushed into the Middle of the M8 as a sort of McFrogger.

She's always twitching her head as if she's trying to flick in a last minute winner.

The Reds have family in the Antiques Trade the Blue Team of lard arse and son stand no chance.

Her-her-her-her

The Son has just produced Twins. No wonder he looks shell-shocked.

Dad works for an engineering company designing winches and cranes to lift him up and to set him down.

He things he can act, sing and dance.

Her-her-her-her.

Son is a head chef who plays the drums or the saucepans as they turn out to be.

The Scottish haggling is embarrassing. The Dealers fighting over the pennies like the future of the World depended on it.

Bingo schools the girls about the Tantalus before showing them how to engage in the unspeakable vice of the Greeks. You are a Bugger, Bingo!

Bingo examines the decanters and looks for chips, at the mention of the National Food Dish, the girl's stomachs start to rumble.

McSlash positive in his estimating for the Reds but there's always the nagging doubt that no matter how decent the items are the McMisers won't be delving very deep into their pockets.

The McWitch/McSlash discussion over the Tantalus has a sacred quality as they regard imbibing the vessels contests of hard liquor akin to receiving the Scottish Elixir of Life or as it turns out in reality, ruin and a long, slow painful death as brain, liver, and heart disintegrate.

McWitch: And I think the decanters are in good condition as well.
McSlash: Also has its key, which is very important.
McWitch: Very, very important, Dennis. How else are you we going to get A-1 muntedly c0ckeyed.
McSlash: A girl after my very own heart Anita. 50 to 70.

Bingo's BB for the Reds looks like that classic glass phallic trophy that was awarded to the fit female golfer. Will the Red Girls be giving us a Kissing Demo on it?




I wanted to surprise you, and make you happy says Bingo, the charmer.

Well, let's hope it's a hole in one and not a bogey for me, shall we?, he says, which is of course expert code for threesome.

Love of Sport singular not Sports, this is the UK not bloody gun-toting, bible-bashing, living in delusion U.S. of Bloody A!!!

Lamb/Sheep leg holder might be popular in Wales. Cough. Well if you can't take the p1ss out of yourself then what can you take the p1ss out of?

He was playing with it balls and all then he tested the bagatelle game.

Paul mentions the numerous nature of Scottish Liquid Churches that have been visited for boozy worship. His BB reflects this. A cigar lighter. Nice one Mr. Laidlaw.

Unusual cigar bar lighter, no not Gaultier, Wokesfuhrer Treepants.

Smoking items are not popular says McWitch who has some uncomfortable encounters with local stakeholders and local cleansing fires.

This is Scotland FFS, smoking items will always be popular.

Apart from the lamb grip everything seems good for the Blues. Unfortunately, there is the small matter of the actual Auction to negotiate.

Jeez what a McMotley Bunch crammed into the Auction Room. Free heating, water, toilet facilities, and soap on offer.



Unbelievable a profit on the first item. Am I dreaming? Is the Princess going to come in, sit on my lap, and disrobe?

Now the barrel makes a profit. What is happening have the Scots been taken over by Alien Invaders.



Another Profit.

A SCOTTISH GOLDEN GAVEL IN THE MCMISER HEARTLANDS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Christina and Roo in Boots sit on both my knees.

That's Bingo sorted out for tonite then.

Now the BB. The phallus is paraded by a female in a scene reminiscent of The Wicker Man.



Another profit. A Grand Slam of Glory.



Reds 65 note profit and a GG!!!

Blues on Next. Surely lightning can't strike twice in the same place.

Geoffrey Hughes Blues aka Twiggy is very excited.

Oh dear Dutch Auction on the Lamb Leg holder.

The first loss on possibly the weakest item.

Dutch Auction on the Writing Slope now.

Normal service has resumed.

Clowning bagatelle on the slippery slope too.

Another loss. Anti-Golden Gavel, Leaded Hammer, obtained.

Paul's nifty BB now. Surely a profit. Yes. Straight to profit.

Makes a fiver. Was probably worth more.

Blues -48. None too shabby for this place. Certainly seen much worse here.

Confused Kick. The usual mess cauded by McWitch's befuddle spell.

 

Adrian Edmondson and Kim Jong Il feeling ronely at the back.

 

Her mate's a bit of a harder sell though.

 

The sound of 2 sets of knickers hitting the floor in unison is deafening.

 

BBC approved preamble:
Edinburgh 19
Bargain HuntSeries 47-49 (Shortened Versions)
https://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/m0005xkd
Anita Manning is at the antiques fair at the Royal Highland Centre in Edinburgh with the reds and blues and experts Paul Laidlaw and John Cameron.

A shortened version of this one:
Edinburgh 19
Series 47
https://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/b08ywl5n
Two competitive teams take on the Bargain Hunt challenge in Edinburgh. Anita Manning attempts to toss the caber, and the reds and blues shop with experts Paul Laidlaw and John Cameron at the antiques fair at the Royal Highland Centre.

The Translation:
It's a trip North of the border where the drone of the Bagpipes competes with the drone of Sylvester McCoy's Disturbed cousin. McWitch introduces us to some Laddie Strapping. She reveals she's wearing a diabolical strap-on. Some reach around wood tossing of some poor unfortunate in a BH fleece while she sinisterly pants Her-her-her Almost there. The poor sod, quite lierally, will be scarred for life, mentally, and physically, as there was no Linseed oil on hand at the time. Helping her to cover up this crime are Bingo Cameron and Paul Laidalot, or so he implies, the Highland Stag and their Fence for Offence, Ted McSlash of the Glasgow Greasers Razor Gang. He gavels with an open cut-throat razor. His cut of the profits is some cash with a jagged gash.

The Staff:
[Gaffer] Anita McWitch Manning
[Red Team Expert] John Bingo Marine Boy Cameron
[Blue Team Expert] Paul Laid The Law and The Law Won Laidlaw, an extra out of Still Game
[Auctioneer] Dennis Clark McSlasher, Scots Ted
[Auction Location] Shapes Auctioneers, Edinburgh
[Miserlin Rating] One Star, it's Scotland remember

​

The Teams:
[Red Team] Female Friends who originally met as McToddlers, which Scotland means at any time when people are staggering out of the pub. They both played basketball for Scotland which is akin to being capped by the Faroe Islands for International Tiddlywinks. They both have family in the Antiques Trade. No pressure then.
[Blue Team] Father and son, Senior is Scottish Lard Champion while Junior holds the World Record for his Dried Thistle Collection. A real Team of All-Stars.

The Shopping:
Reds: Scottish Monart glass vase (90) OK, Oak barrel upcycled umbrella stand (35) OK, Tantalus with 2 decanters (50) Good.
Blues: The coated silver, manche a gigot, lamb leg holder (35) slightly rich like the potential lamb, Victorian papier-mache writing box (75) Good, Clown bagatelle game (28) OK.

The Distraction:
None, but in the original one, McWitch slurred and droned her way through early 20th Century Cloak Fasteners like a puch-drunk prize fighter who recently had a stroke.

​

The Auction:
Reds: Scottish Monart glass vase (10 profit), Oak barrel upcycled umbrella stand (25 profit) Surely not a Jockular GG, Tantalus with 2 decanters (5 profit).
Bingo's BB is a Boxed Waterford crystal golfing figure, very phallic (25), 30-50, 50. A 25 note profit on top of the Golden Gavel too. Outstanding work John.

​

Blues: The coated silver, manche a gigot, lamb leg holder (15 loss), Victorian papier-mache writing box (35 loss), Clown bagatelle game (28).
Laidalot's BB is a Victorian Mr Punch cigar bar lighter attachment (55), 60-100, 60. A profit but it deserved to make more.

​

The Aftermath:
You know when you're at an Antiques Fair in Scotland when there's an Any Item On This Table For 1 Scottish Pound and nothing has shifted from it. Perhaps they'll have to lower it to 10 pence to get some joy. Well, talk about a game of 2 halves. Nowadays, they would have put the Reds on last. The Scrooge Auction Rooms and Ted McSlash have not been happy hunting grounds in the past so the expectation bar was set suitably low. Bingo's Sporty Reds were up first. Then something remarkable happened. Profit, profit, profot, profit. Every item returns extra cash for a Bingo bonanza. A profit Grand Slam 65 notes = 65 portions of chips and McCurry sauce, and a Golden Gavel which means everyone will be talking about you, for the right reasons, and you'll be drunken best pals for life, so long as you get the drinks in. Then the usual happened, Loss, Loss, Loss, almost Loss (a fiver profit). Normal order was resumed. The possessed demons of profit were exorcised with a good dowsing of the Scottish Holy Water of Loss. The Power of Scotland compels you. You do not pass Go and you end with a loss of 48 notes. The only item not to make a loss was Paul's Mr Punch bar cigar lighter. Anywhere else in the UK and that item makes a tidy profit. So, despite McWitch and the McMiser Auction we ended up with an entertaining episode.

​

The Hi-Kick:
Standard indoor kick. It's all a bit of a mess. McWitch as usual barely tries. Blue Dad and the Red Girls are up early, idiot Blue Son tries to beat the old hag to giving the lowest possible kick while the 2 experts are a tad late but we do get a Laidlow bonus fist pump for good measure. No head kick Growlers from the s0-called sporty lasses. Yes, YES!!

​

 

cracking episode, deserving the extensive portion Reg's relish.

the xG* is always low in Pictland, yet Bingo scores!

Did Laidlaw ever appear again? perhaps this was the episode that broke him?!

*(='expected gavels')

p.s. Good spot!
"Bingo's BB for the Reds looks like that classic glass phallic trophy that was awarded to the fit female golfer"

 

What an absolute shambles of a kick.

Makes me want to hate all bargain hunters. They should be shot.

 

Bingo and Reds agree on how to celebrate later...


"So....fisting?"
"Yay, fisting!"

 

Topicaltastic.

 

===Makes me want to hate all bargain hunters. They should be shot.

'What you talkin' 'bout, Willis?'



'Yeah, you tell him, Danny.'

 

BH Legacy Time. The first of the non-visual episodes. Time to get the white stick out and the Braille skills.
BBC approved preamble:
Detling 25
S46E02
https://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/b0854pzt
Charlie Ross presents a festive edition of the antiques series from Detling in Kent. Experts Raj Bisram and Richard Madley assist the two teams in their Christmas shopping. There's a tense atmosphere in the saleroom, as the reds and blues go head to head. Charlie Ross also pays a visit to Leeds Castle where he discovers the history of Christmas decorations.

The Translation:
No Xmas for John Quays sang The Fall and it's No Xmas Review for Detling 25. Not strictly true as I can still gather Result info and odds & ends from the subtitle file. This is Part 1 of a festive double-header featuring the Fool and 2 different sets of experts. First up, it's Dr Evil and Madders Madley as they re-enact Ebenezer Roscoe Scrooge, who really puts the D1ck into D1ckens, being given the willies by the Ghosts of the Christmas experts. The Auction is the same for both with that Posh Irish Gavel Lady, Cliona Kilroy Was Here. There, and Everywhere, in Canterbury, Kent. From past memories, she was a bit shiiit. Festive Bargain Hunt usually means thick jumpers and hats in the middle of summer with other fairgoers wandering around in shorts, with a Festive Distraction, and forced jolity in a faux Xmas Auction. Bah Humbug.

​

The Staff:
[Gaffer] Charlie Ross
[Red Team Expert] Raj Bisram
[Blue Team Expert] Richard Madley
[Auctioneer] Cliona Kilroy
[Auction Location] Canterbury Auction Galleries
[Miserlin Rating] Unlisted

The Teams:
[Red Team] Sisters Sue and Nicky, one of them had it for 16 years and was a professional dancer. Oh yeah. A showgirl. Clothes on or Clothes Off?
[Blue Team] Identical Twins Dan and Sam, evidently one is in denim. So no double denim then. One's a sparks who also flew helicopters so he'll be twirling his chopper while the other does something with fitness. Fascinating not.

The Shopping:
Reds: Chrome-plated Art Deco lady (35) 15-20, Sledge (10) 5-10, 18ct gold ring with stones (175) 100-150.
Blues: Vintage Pyrene fire extinguisher (15) 5-10, Low-grade silver Goblet (60) 25-30, Railway first aid kit (35) 10-15.

The Distraction:
The T1t pays a visit to Leeds Castle where he discovers the history of Christmas decorations.

​

Urgh we could have had, but in fact thankfully miss, Last Xmas by Tragicooper and his mate Gary Peeeedgely.

The Auction:
Reds: Chrome-plated Art Deco lady (40 profit), Sledge (25 profit) GG on, 18ct gold ring with stones (15 loss).
Raj's BB are a Couple of siphons and a little 1950s cocktail shaker (22), REJECTED 5-10, 5. They would have lost 17 notes. Sounds like skipware.
Blues: Vintage Pyrene fire extinguisher (20 profit), Low-grade silver Goblet (25 loss), Railway first aid kit (25 loss).
Madders BB is a an Edwardian watercolour of a continental (rude and nude?) scene of skaters on a lake in Austria by an unknown artist (5), 10-15 she likes this despite its worn condition, 25. 20 note profit. Good work Madders.

The Aftermath:
Auctioneer not that impressed with the Reds items. Undervaluing them. Does the same for the Blues. Perhaps she knows that she'll be hopeless selling them. Madders Blues were on first so you know what that might mean. Except this time it doesn't. A rofit on the fire extinguish before 2 similar losses. Madders reduces the arrears to 10 notes with a nice watercolour, we assume, that makes a profit. Raj's Reds deliver 2 profits, surely not a GG. No, the 18ct gold ring which sounded nice just fell short at 160. Close but no cigar, or should we say Golden Gavel. His cheap and cheerful cocktail set, was Rejected by his team, rightly so, as it only sold for a fiver, 17 notes short. The Reds take home 50 notes which would've turned out to be 33 if they had taken the BB.

Reds +50 (33 if they had gone with rejected BB)
Blues -10

The Hi-Kick:
Who knows.

 

He did this set of 4 and the 2 Xmas episodes from about this time.

 

McWitch always that effect with her befuddle spell. I'll get the stake and fire ready.

 

BH Legacy Double Dollop.
BBC approved preamble:
Detling 26
S46E03
https://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/b0863wy9
Charlie Ross and the Bargain Hunt team are in fine festive fettle! Charlie presents a festive edition of the antiques series from Detling in Kent. The teams will be led around the antiques fair by experts John Cameron and Nick Hall. On their Christmas list will be three items which they hope to sell at a profit at auction, but who will come out on top in the saleroom? Plus Charlie takes time out and heads to Leeds Castle to discover the history behind traditional Christmas dinner.

The Translation:
Part 2 of the Fool's Christmas Carol. Who the D1ckens is it this time. He's joined by the Ghost of Xmas Plaid and the Ghost of Pompey Profits, a Ghost who has almost faded out of existence, like the gold doubloons not found at the Southsea Auction House. Auction is once again with the Croakily Lion, the posh Leprechaun Lover.

The Staff:
[Gaffer] Charlie Ross
[Red Team Expert] Nick Hall
[Blue Team Expert] John Cameron
[Auctioneer] Cliona Kilroy
[Auction Location] Canterbury Auction Galleries
[Miserlin Rating] Unlisted

​

The Teams:
[Red Team] Retired married couple Pat and John. Pat is a writer and a medium aka a charlatan. John is responsible for bringing back the Birdy Song in the 80s. All hate mail should be addressed to that Bald Red Kunt on Detling Xmas Special, c/o BH Prod Team, Muttley's Shed, Oblivion.
[Blue Team] Retired married couple Frances and Brian, who were neighbours who met watching each other through the twitching net curtains

​

The Shopping:
Reds: Japanese Satsuma vase, damaged (45) ouch 10-15, Art Deco wrought-iron hall stand for Hall (150) ouch 50-70, 1930s frosted glass lampshade (35) top end 20-30.
Blues: Mahogany propeller boss with a treen box thrown in for free (30) OK 25-35, 20th-century painted rocking horse (65) ouch 20-30, 3 amber-tinted glass apothecary bottles (80) ouch 20-30.

The Distraction:
The Fool visits Leeds Castle to talk about Xmas Dinner. Some posh bird shows Charl-eh her Xmas dumplings and hopes for a good nut stuffing while he acts like a right Pudding, the old fruit, in this segment that's a bit of a Turkey.

​

The Auction:
Reds: Japanese Satsuma vase, damaged (35 loss), Art Deco wrought-iron hall stand for Hall (125 loss), 1930s frosted glass lampshade (25 profit).
Plaidy's BB is a 1798 London silver Bateman sauce boat (45), 25-35, 110. 65 profit, superb work Nick.

​

Blues: Mahogany propeller boss with a treen box thrown in for free (10 loss), 20th-century painted rocking horse (35 loss), 3 amber-tinted glass apothecary bottles (60 loss) Anti-GG achieved.
Bingo's BB is a 1885 Moscow silver and niello work snuff box (125), 60-80, 170. The look of defiance on Marine Boy's face said it all.

​

The Aftermath:
Terrible, terrible Auction. Unenthusiastic estimating and selling. No wonder Canterbury got dropped not long afterwards. Not even a faux Xmas setting.. Plaidy's Reds got hammered by the damage on their vase, I assume it wasn't done in transit, and then the wrought-iron hall stand which he loved ended up as a rusting hulk of a loss but at least the lampshade cashed in. Then, it was the first part of the BB Bonanza as the Sauce Boat creamed off a huge profit to rescue them from 3-figure ignomy with a 70 quid loss. Bingo's Blue Team's 3 items were very steady, very steady in the loss-making department, and after the bottles had lost them 60 GBP, they were also heading for a 3 -figure loss. However, this was without John's Russian snuff box to be taken into consideration. Despite the pessimism from the Irish Doomster on the rostrum, it burst into life and brought them back to a 60 note loss by making a very tidy 45 note profit. It was just enough for the Blues to win. 2 of the most likeable experts, particularly with them dressing up as a Turkey and Xmas pud in the Intro, and 2 excellent BBs. make up for the crap Auction and even worse Auctioness. Overall, an entertaining episode.

​

The Hi-Kick:
Far from standard outside kick in front of Canterbury Cathedral. Great backdrop. Certainly beats being in front of some shelves. The Fool's up early and high as usual with everyone bar Red Lady, the spirits of the dead obstructed her, and Blue Bloke, the spirit of whisky obstructed him, hitting par. Yes, YES!!

​