Things you hate IV

My nana is blind and terrified of spiders. Every year I dutifully gather a bag of conkers for her, every year we take her to buy a new Hoover after she vacuums them all up.

 

It is a myth. My daughter is petrified of them, so we got some conkers and put them on the windowsill. Several spiders have set up home there, using the conker as a nice object to hide behind and have proceeded to cover them in webs. If anything, they seem to like them.

 

The brash and obnoxious manner of the Italian gardener next door.

This morning I heard some shouting, which made me think someone was leading a team while work was going on with a crane lorry or on the building in scaffolding a few doors away, although I could hear no other noise apart from a vehicle reversing. Or there was some argument between residents in the street.

It turned out it was just him having a conversation with one of his employers (god knows why that is still the case over four years on) in his typically ranting manner despite being only a few metres from her. And that’s on top of his extremely noisy, smelly and environment-polluting power tools, and the generally crap job he does despite taking an inordinately long time over their two small gardens (including sometimes coming back a few days later to finish the job).

 

I went purely to learn classics. Dropped out after 2 years.

Spoiler alert, my career has been ****.

 

Every sympathy and while you made (what turned out to be) an error of judgement, it isn't a parenting fail at all. I rate the mid-teen stage of our daughters life the toughest time of my life, when the toughest of decisions need to be made, with the inevitable (errors of judgement) occur.

The positive side to this is that your obviously decent daughter will know she has let you down, will expect it less in the future.

 

15 year old girls may be able to be sensible. 15 year old boys….not a chance

 

That’s a shame when you were being hospitable and tolerant by buying them booze. I think it’s a good idea to let your kids have a little alcohol under supervision to help them learn to drink responsibly. However, you may have an awkward moment explaining to other parents no really, I just bought them all a few vodkas.

It’s not like this is restricted to 15 year olds. My 19 year old got absolutely plastered the other day giving the full vomit and I love you mum and dad I really do treatment and then he had a night out recently where a girl in his group, also 19, sat by a certain pond outside a certain well known nightclub incoherently pissed and crying her eyes out. Kids huh?

 

TBF @HappyHornet24 I would be far more worried if a group of 15 year-olds partying with free booze (under my watch) were dignified, moderate and respectful.

 

Bacon sarnies ? No snitching. Sounds great. So when is the WFC Forums party and can I book one of your parking spaces ? No vodka, promise, well…..

 

My daughter turned 14 two weeks ago, thanks for the advance warning.

 

God, I hope whoever had that vodka (sounds like that boy had the lion's share of it, or maybe he just has a low alcohol tolerance) is OK now and has learnt his/her lesson!

I don't have kids but I imagine spirits unless consumed in very low moderation are dangerous for kids that age, when they still lack maturity and are both emotionally and physically vulnerable and get easily tired so I can imagine what a large amount of spirit could do to them. I remember when at 15 I got bollocked by my parents when I was playing a video game until 2 am (not a time I stayed up till very often back then) and was still in bed when called for lunch, so I must have been in bed for 11 hours!

 

Trains and thetrainline.com

OK so I'm tired and grumpy after our inept non-show at Leeds, but still...

With the petrol shortage I didn't fancy driving up there to empty most of a tankful so decided to take the train and meet my friend there instead, rather than pick him up in Sheffield. I got the early train from Leeds after leaving the game with 10 minutes to go. Great, I thought, I'll get home an hour early. But then it was slightly delayed getting to Manchester so I missed the early connection to Milton Keynes. I had to spend nearly an hour at Manchester Piccadilly. I end up getting the train originally planned to MK, which arrived on time. Only 5 minutes to wait for the onward connection to my home station however when I looked up at the departures board I discover it was cancelled due to not enough staff. So despite starting my return journey an hour earlier I end up getting home half an hour late. The only positive of the day becomes another negative alongside the ***** match, ***** weather, ***** city and ***** Leeds fans.

So I go on to Trainline.com when I get home to claim a partial refund, to find I can't get it from them even though I paid them, I have to go to the rail operators website and enter all the details of the late train and my bank account details. What a convoluted **** show! If their train is late, they should automatically refund us rather than wait for a claim.

Bring back British Rail, all is forgiven!

 

What you think you have: a more sensible 15 year old younger sibling.

What you actually have: a 15 year old younger sibling who is better at covering her tracks.

 

People who say "simples". Copying an advert is neither funny or original.

 

Yep, I used to work with with someone who couldn’t help repeat meaningless sayings and catchphrases when the opportunity arose. Used to drive me mad. “I left it to the last minute” “last minute.com?” Yes very clever you berk.

 

Good, straightforward post. Does exactly what it says on the tin.

 

Shood of gone specksavers

 

Pundits talking directly into the camera when their co commentator or host asks them a question.

I find it so awkward. I think it's made its way over from America. I guess to try to bring the audience in to the conversation.

It feels just rude that someone asked them a question and they look away from the asker right into the camera to answer instead of answering to the person who asked the question. It feels rude and weird.

 

Must of/have been mentioned before but Gogglebox? What ? Why? I’ve never seen an advertising clip that gives so much as a hint as to why anyone would watch it. Is it to laugh at the appalling non entities showing off to try to get the viewers attention ? Or laughing with them because they are fabulously talented and deserve to be on TV?

 

Richie Benaud used to do this. It looked really weird then, because no one else did it.

 

Googlebox came up only a few pages back

 

“England 86 all out. Australia 698 for 2. Dear, oh dear. What are they playing at out there?”
I miss Richie.

 

But how often has mrs brown been on?

 

Gogglebox watching Mrs Brown's Boys would be a real treat

 

And it isn't just the TV show itself that I hate. I'd even argue it's worse than Mrs Brown's Boys for its role in the 'idiotification' (yes I'm making words up now) of television, as it has seeped into other TV shows.

If a programme pans to a member/ members of the audience, who is clearly mic'd up, and tries to 'naturally' express an opinion that the audience should be feeling "OMG she is SO funny" "I can't believe he just said that" etc., I turn over instantly. Stop wasting time telling me I should laugh, or be annoyed, or happy, and just make high quality TV that makes me feel that way.

 

This is the latest feature on all those tv talent shows.

Some 'ordinary' audience members gasping and exclaiming how amazing the act is, or speculating about whether they will be great or not before they start.

 

I do like Gogglebox a lot, but agree it’s effing awful when exported to audiences for shows.

 

That vacuous, attention seeking tart Jesy Nelson, formerly of Little Mix.

Claimed to want privacy and her life back, along with mental health concerns, only to return a few month later with her new (******* awful) song "Boyz", about wanting to get a length off a criminal, and thrusting as much make-up caked flesh down the camera as possible.