Things you hate IV

Discussion in 'Taylor's Tittle-Tattle - General Banter' started by hornmeister, Jun 25, 2019.

  1. wfcmoog

    wfcmoog Tinpot

    Men who piss on the seat. Lift it up ffs.
     
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  2. miked2006

    miked2006 Premiership Prediction League Proprietor

    I'd rather a rabbit than a hamster or guinea pig. Or fish.

    But yes. No idea why you'd want a rabbit over a cat.
     
  3. Yes, bloody ridiculous way of serving it, but great fun though gets more difficult after a few glasses if you are serving yourself.
     
  4. Diamond

    Diamond First Team

    Never understood how some people can be so utterly ignorant of anything but themselves. How can a person leave a toilet in any state other than how they found it, (or better)?
    There are some sh*t parents out there.
     
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  5. hornmeister

    hornmeister Club Legend

    In every job I've had I've experienced poor toilet ettiquete with shared facilities. I guess there are some people out there that just think soemone else will deal with it. I shudder to think what their home facilities would be like if treated the same way.

    We had a phantom crapper in one of my places of business. Despite loo brushes being provided regularly one of the traps would regularly be left in an awful state. That chap must had had something seriously wrong with his guts or eaten the mutha load of my chilli pickle. Anyway I got fed up of visiting for my morning constitutional, only to have to make a detour to another floor due to the visual and olfactorary horror. I camped out at the other end of the dead end access corridor and surveyed the loos after every visitor, eventually tracking down the culprit.

    Another loo weirdo I've encountered is the person that point blank refused to use any of the last few sheets on the roll, or change the roll, despite spares being on the shelf right behind the loo. If there was less then 1/2 cm of thickness left on the roll he'd proceed to start one of the new rolls on the shelf and leave it there with the end flapping about.

    My personal pet peeve is the incorrect placement of the roll on the holder. Remember people, "Beards Good, Mullets Bad".
     
    Last edited: Sep 22, 2022 at 12:55 PM
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  6. Moose

    Moose First Team Captain

    Not at all odd work behaviour that, spying on colleagues coming and going from the toilet and then checking the state of bowls afterwards.

    A place I worked had a guy who regularly blocked the toilets. I overheard him every so often while I was in there for a piss. It sounded like he was wallpapering the cubicle while trying to grab hold of a pig. Frightening stuff.
     
  7. hornmeister

    hornmeister Club Legend

    A subtle hint to him did solve the issue though.

    As a kid I always found it amusing that my mate's house had a stack of magazines in the the loo. I wanted to spend as little time on the bog as possible.

    As I have got older, I now understand the need for some reading material to pass the time as downstairs is not as rapid as it once was.
     
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  8. wfcmoog

    wfcmoog Tinpot

    Lower carbon footprint as they're vegan
    Nicer poos
    No danger to wildlife
    Don't roam into other people's gardens and ****
    Don't carry toxoplasmosis
    Generally cheaper to keep
    Are there when you want them
    aren't nature's biggest ****s
     
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  9. wfcmoog

    wfcmoog Tinpot

    Right, so the end goes over the front of the roll, not the back
     
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  10. wfcmoog

    wfcmoog Tinpot

    I never knew we worked together.
     
  11. wfcmoog

    wfcmoog Tinpot

    thumb_prrrt-pmavnw-png-101-kb-png-assert-your-dominance-this-19541925.png Someone emptied the roll and left me with rattling cardboard inside the dispenser. Luckily I had a packet of tissues and it was a near ghostie.
     
  12. Hornpete

    Hornpete Squad Player

    Once had an awful s*** up the seat and cistern and floor "incident" at work (customer not me). Went to get a colleague (to assist me clearing as it wasn't a 1 man job).

    Got back with a bucket of hot water, disinfectant, elbow length gloves, bin bags, cloths and mops 2 or 3 minutes later... Only to find someone was using the cubicle!

    Also know of someone who pooped in cups and saucepans and bowls instead of a toilet and left them all round his flat. Social services were "concerned for his welfare".
     
  13. Maninblack

    Maninblack Reservist

    Steve Harrison?
     
  14. wfcmoog

    wfcmoog Tinpot

  15. Keighley

    Keighley Squad Player

    No m8, this thread is supposed to generate some debate.
     
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  16. wfcmoog

    wfcmoog Tinpot

    And their dogs
     
  17. Filbert

    Filbert Leicester supporting bloke

    We used to get weekly timber deliveries from this one company and about once a month we’d get a driver who became affectionately known as ‘Billy Threeshits’

    ‘Just use your toilet’ he’d say as he finished unstrapping the load to be forked off, stomping past you clutching the back of his trousers with one hand and pushing his glasses up his nose with the other. This is known as ‘The Threeshits Shuffle’ and is still imitated to this day. (We don’t buy their timber anymore)

    The smell was ******* horrendous. It would permeate the entrance to the building, the corridor, the office and could even be detected 50 feet away in the warehouse at the back of the building. Take the worst food poisoning **** you’ve ever done and times it by ten.

    I’m a polite and friendly guy, to a fault it seems. I let this go a dozen plus times. As lorry drivers often seem determined to do he’d told me about his difficult home life when making small talk and I felt bad for him. I told myself he probably had IBS or something.

    One time I’d got visitors due any minute and he turned up. I couldn’t have him stinking the place out so when he set off for his **** I lied like the coward I am and said it was out of order. Said we were using the unit next door’s loo while we waited for a plumber. He only ******* changed course and headed to let himself into their unit for a dump. Anyway I had to shout after him and come clean. I suggested he stopped on his way back up the M1 because someone in the office had complained about the smell in the toilet after his last visit. He was mortified. Crestfallen. A husk of a man on his following visits.
     
  18. Filbert

    Filbert Leicester supporting bloke

    That’s just reminded me of another lorry driver who used to deliver and tell us about his messy divorce and custody battle. There’s a long version of the story but;

    - Got arrested for assaulting someone at the beach who suggested that his son stopped climbing on the unsteady cliff

    - Waved his c*ck at a woman while sat at traffic lights (according to another driver)

    - Ended up with a restraining order because he called his ex wife over 100 times in one night. His punchline to that story was ‘If she’d answered the first time I wouldn’t have had to keep calling her’

    - Was eventually fired for not securing who knows how many tonnes of timber products which spilled out all over a roundabout and miraculously didn’t kill anyone
     
  19. wfcmoog

    wfcmoog Tinpot

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  20. Robert Peel

    Robert Peel Reservist

    It's funny how some people, particularly me, spend so much time worrying about a multitude of things and lose sleep, whilst absolute arseh01es like this stride round, convinced of their own superiority and being completely right about everything.

    Just to top it off, was he a fat ugly ba5tard as well?
     
  21. Filbert

    Filbert Leicester supporting bloke

    He was built like Danny DeVito. The logistics of him waving his **** out of a lorry window are mind boggling.
     
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  22. Filbert

    Filbert Leicester supporting bloke

    Nah but I eat plenty duuuuude :cool:
     
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  23. K9 Hornet

    K9 Hornet Border Collie Dog

    Did he have wood? Or had he already delivered the timber at that point?
     
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  24. Filbert

    Filbert Leicester supporting bloke

    You know, I never thought to ask.
     
  25. Diamond

    Diamond First Team

  26. wfcwarehouse

    wfcwarehouse First Team Captain

  27. Filbert

    Filbert Leicester supporting bloke

  28. Moose

    Moose First Team Captain

    Zips. Any jacket or coat I have with a zip is always getting it caught on the lining.

    Life is so cruel and I want to cry.
     
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  29. I share your pain.
     
  30. Agree. Expresso is for those who want caffeine but don't want "a drink". Pro-plus already caters for this market.
     
  31. K9 Hornet

    K9 Hornet Border Collie Dog

    Perhaps Filbert meant the use of the word Expresso instead of Espresso?
     
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  32. Keighley

    Keighley Squad Player

    I fear TuT has been whooshed... :D
     
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  33. Filbert

    Filbert Leicester supporting bloke

    That’s a whooshin’ alright.
     
  34. Not whooshed, just ignorant. I genuinely didn't realise it was an "espresso" rather than "expresso" as I never order them. Live and learn. It's a real education reading this forum.
     
  35. Espressos.
    Espressos are for those who want caffeine but don't want "a drink". Pro-plus already caters for this market.
    :)
     
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