Bargain Hunt

Ticks BBC quota boxes?

Woman
Working Class
Northern
Old
Disability 1 (Hideousness)
Disability 2 (Yorkshireness)
Disability 3 (Uselessness)

 

"Oh go on please...it is my birthday...i will go gently...double condom..."

 

Good point.
His voice is worse, but the above is mitigation.

 

Vague previous mutterings in Jul 2022 (Page 17!!!!) and a more thorough chin-wag from Aug last year .....

Reg:
No past Chattery Tw@ttery for this one (July 2022), pre- @OldTraff78 joining.

OT78:
ha. i did think it felt 'new'.

Previous episode:
Moog:
Absolute shambles today Reg. Sent to the antiques fair at closing time. Supposed to have an hour, but after 20 minutes most of the stalls were closed. Then off to Tubby Thomas' Tavern of Tighwads.

Absolute farce. I won't be paying my licence fee this year.

Reg:
The word Tumbleweed was used during the Auction which made me chuckle.

Tash the Cheese Teapot.



Diamond:
This is one of my favourite ever pictures posted on this forum.

Timmy:
In a coat not unlike Dizzies "hug me like I'm your favourite Teddy" coat! Or is that "hug me like I'm wearing your favourite Teddy". Hmmm. I miss that young woman... (goes off in to a darkened room, quietly humming "always on my mind")

Reg:
Here's mine.



OT78:
Christina cupping huge balls will always be popular here

Reg:
The shirt wouldn't be Red for long.

Oh yeah, here's another.



[COMMENT: Back to the episode in hand, whereas yesterday's was very much in hand]

An older Foghorn, in person and episode (2 years ago) one today.

What sartorial and styling horrors will be in evidence today.

Tubby, Sarky, and D1ckie Dalek.

Talk about Bad Hair Shouty Day.

Reds are BAME mother and daughter, doctor and actor

Blues Retired Mother and Plod Son.

NO PEEKING!!!!

Asian/American connection.

Rolling Stones mirror?



Does Tubby want to get Jigger Jiggy with the Reds?

Spoons in a box for a pound. They buy it.

Everything on the table is a pound. I would buy 2 + the BB from that table. That would leave 297 to spunk on 1 item.

Submarine plaque for 20 notes for the Blues.

Don't get too Kocky Mark.



Tubby's Reds still haven't bought anything.

Venus emerges. Into the swamp she submerges.



Tinpot collecting.

Grim mugshot side profile. What a harridan.



Slowcoach Reds.

Worn Teddies.

Timmy:
Is this a fetish related comment referring to my post yesterday? (goes off again... quietly humming "always on my mind" again... to a darkened room.. again)

Reg:
Mohair and No hair jokes Tubby.

Medical Teaching Aid sucks all their cash.

Pedal cars can be a graveyard. 275 Jeez, don't pay that.

250 is the best. 245. Really. Disaster incoming.

Cameras don't do well Tubby.

28 notes. It's also got a decent lens.

Reds buy Japanese evening bag, medical teaching aid, vintage camera.

Big loss incoming.

73 notes for Tubby to waste.

Blues buy spoons, submarine plaque, pedal car.

Profit, profit, huge farking loss.

Poor Sarky he's onto a loser here. Young Plod's judgement is suspect, welcome to the Police.

Sarky just has 34 for something weather related.

Moog:
Blues have bought brilliantly for 2 out of 3....
That yellow car is a definite bomb

OT78:
Tubby enjoys making a bear growl.
"Me too," thinks Mark

Reg:
The Dalek is definitely plunger down on the Red items. He exterminates the medical aid.

He laughs about the 1 pound spoons.

He doesn't laugh about the car.

Reds up. The purse loses 15.

Medical aid is galloping along. It makes 100 so loses 59.

Oh dear, Tubby disaster on the cards.

Camera loses 13. Anti-GG achieved. LOL.

Tubby BB is a 1920s mother-of-pearl silk lined box. 73

Thomas shoot off says Foghorn.

He might do inside that silky lined box.

OT78:
lovely box!

(not a double entendre)

Reg:
80, it makes 7 whole pounds. Tubby is very smug.

Reds -80.

Blues up.

1 note spoons. 9 note profit. LOL.

The submarine plaque. Another profit. This time its 15 notes.

The car plummets to a 85 loss as expected.

Moog:
Does well to lose only 85 quid.

Reg:
Sarky BB is a 1903 Birmingham silver topped umbrella for 15. It makes a profit of 25. It's raining cash.

Blues -36.

Dalek Winterton certainly knows how to conduct an Auction.

Decent kick from most.



2 Terrible big spends sink both teams. The prices they paid were the height of stupidity.

Is Ronnie Biggs involved in today's (the next) episode?

 

An echo from last August. LOL

 

Sorry Gents, I just couldn't bring myself to watch it today. Couldn't face a Bawley one.
I realise I've let the side down - (well TBH I've not managed to watch many live lately, even the ones I've wanted to)

anyway - according to google AI...



fancy going on telly and putting that down as your job.
(i did the odd bit of negotiation on the back seat in my youth - but that was (usually) in a stationary car)

 

As I finish lunch today, why am I reminded of Dizzie??

 

Re-up from August 2024 and Re-Re-up from July 2022 with additions.
BBC approved preamble:
Shrewsbury 22
Series 62
https://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/m001973p
Caroline Hawley is in Shrewsbury, where experts Thomas Forrester and Mark Stacey lend a hand to the red and blue teams before they head to auction in Lichfield. Caroline learns about the history of tinplate toys.

The Translation:
Oh shiiit, it's a new BH with Foghorn Atomic Boom, Headache Hawley as presenter with her Spent Placenta-style hairdo. She'll probably be dressed up as Austin Powers in Drag again, puke-a-delic baby. Joining the sh1teshow in Shrewsbury will be SAS, he who dares loses a lot of money, Tubby Thomas, the useless Auctioneer, and Sarky Marky. At least Jericho won't be Auctioneering and watching the profits disappear into a Black Hole. Instead, Auction duties will be undertaken by King Dalek Winterton, so at least a decent Auction is in store.

The Staff:
[Gaffer] Caroline Hawley with her exclusive Abominable aborted foetus collection
[Red Team Expert] Tubby Thomas Forrester, the plump schoolboy, bursting with Pie.
[Blue Team Expert] Sarky Marky Stacey, the sleazy, slurry somnambulist, he's Pansytastic.
[Auctioneer] Richard Emperor Dalek Winterton
[Auction Location] Skaro aka Lichfield, Staffs
[Miserlin Rating] Unlisted

Urgh!!

​

The Teams:
[Red Team] UK Asian (box ticked) Doctor Mother and actress daughter (resting obviously)
(Challenge: Asian connection)
[Blue Team] Retired Mother and Plod Son
(Challenge: American connection)

The Shopping:
Reds: Japanese themed evening bag (40 Challenge) Struggle, Medical teaching aid (159) Struggle, Praktica SLR camera (28) half a chance.
Blues: Set of boxed Sheffield silver-plated spoons (1) should be fine LOL, Brass US submarine plaque (20 Challenge) profit all day long, 1950s-style American pedal car (245) oh dear, way overspent LOL.

Caroline's latest Makeover!!!

​

The Distraction:
Horror-voice Hawley shouts about the history of tinplate toys to go with her tinpot presenting skills. Clockwork toys for her clockwork brain. Hair by VD Monsoon. Get the Hartlepool look.

​

The Auction:
Reds: Japanese themed evening bag (15 loss), Medical teaching aid (59 loss), Praktica SLR camera (13 loss). A sterling Anti-GG achieved.
Tubby's BB is a 1920s mother-of pearl box (73), 30-50, probably will struggle, 80, a small Tubby 7 GBP profit. He bursts his trousers in triumph. Midnight feasts all-round. He'll be dining off this minor victory for years to come.

​

Blues: Set of boxed Sheffield silver-plated spoons (9 profit), Brass US submarine plaque (15 profit), BB possible but not probable with the high risk next item, 1950s-style American pedal car (85 loss) no surprise.
Sarky's BB is a 1903 Birmingham silver-topped umbrella (15), 15-25, Dalek likes it, 40, nice profit, well done Sarky.

​

The Aftermath:
Foghorn, aurally and visually repellent, with her terrible patronising patois. Good and Bad in Sarky and Tubby as experts, obviously Jericho would be the Ugly. Terrible dithering Red Team not helped by Tubby's so-called guidance. Blue team who have a massive brainfart moment. The usual up-to-snuff Dalek Auction at Lichfield, capital of Skaro, centre of arm-flinging. Red's eclectic mix, mis-directed by Tubby SOS Thomas, is a triple Tubby Dud for yet another Anti-Golden Gavel. Classic Bunter including an expensive, guaranteed loss-making big spend medical teaching aid. After seeing and hearing Foghorn you could do with Medical First Aid. Blues 1 note bargain spoons were counter-balanced with the severe overspend on the pedal car. Shame as their other items were well on the money. What was Blue Mother thinking with that, such a poor decision. Producing Plod offspring, such a poor decision. Sarky was on good form and Tubby on, good for watching, bad form. The Dalek was good value and Foghorn was so so bad, in every sense, that it made for very entertaining viewing.

Hockney spotted!!



ZIEG!!!!



ZIEG!!!



HEIL!!!



More @wfcmoog Auction Room Babes

​

The Hi-Kick:
Standard indoor Hi-Kick. Generally pretty good, Sarky and Blue Mum struggle to get to 45 but Hawley almost gets her foot into her huge gaping gob and Blue Copper produces an excellent head shot, useful when you need to silence peaceful vigils or for advanced interrogation tactics. Yes, YES!!

​

 

It must certainly chafe.

 

Turned out to be doublement entendu after all!

 

Looks like that dress she once wore at a racetrack episode.

Or simply that you enjoyed tongueing and sucking on that teaty treat.

 

aye aye..

 

Bloody hell!

I knew I should have read the small print on the Auction Babes Endorsement contract!

 

"they're your wives now, moog"

 

Tash in Bondage, is she visiting Pervy Dave.

BDSM and BH in the same line. Never thought I'd see that, even if I did write it.

Her rule book, her Red Card, and her twitchy fingers. For card issuing, that is.

BAME Brothers, one is Cabin Crew. Tongues wag. Mind, a mate of mine Stewarded for 6-9 months in between jobs, and he cleaned up on the Trolly Dolly front, as he very much batted for the home team.

Blues are Friends, one is in a mobility vehicle.

Diversity special, obviously.

Tash with full mane.

Madders and Roo.

Modified or repurposed/Hand decorated

Lucky Dummy as it gets a full view of booted Roo.

Check that the bellows are working.

Blimey!!! On Daytime Telly too!!!!



Roo demonstrates her Handy skills, Cough.



Boot-tastic.



Get them down, is heard shouted.

Prices that is.

Madders talking about touching up.

They're all at it.

 

"I do like a large one," did Red just say?!

What is going on here?

 

Madders Mannequin Mockery.



Welcome to the Thread.



Blue Bloke gets a real eyeful of bare, below hemline flesh.



Roo confesses to many vices. Phew.

Madders confesses to being on the verge of being knackered.

So are we, after seeing Roo parade around in her fab leg wear.

Reds: Indian box, not lovely Roo, tea caddy , decorated saw.

You can't help but touch it, says one of the Reds, before safeguarding issues are raised.

Blues: enamel wall hangings, ceramic vase, workbench and meaty fark off vice.

They were soft like butter first and hard as rock later, methinks.

Roo will be on her Todd. Lucky Todd.

Plod-tastic Distraction.

Tash talks of handcuffs and a big stick.

READY THE HARPOOOOOONNNN!!!!!!



Whistles of the Wolf.

Criminal Losses mentioned, well it is a Foghorn Harpic Auction.

She forgoed the bleach and just used Soda crystals by the look of it.

Jericho loves French. Gulp.

 

Carry On Bargain Hunt today.

 

What was going on with that Little Britain character with the fairground signs?

 

aye aye
Tash in custody...
Try the cuffs?
'Prisoner Cell Block BH'
Foghorn to co-star as Joan Ferguson

 

Annnd we go to auction. Why spoil it.

 

Awful auctioneer as well as presenter.

 

COVER YOUR EARS.



Blues on first.

Roo dressed like a Trolly Dolly.

Blues: 35 profit on the enamelled things, that big vase loses 50, oooffff, workbench and vice loses 30. Terrible.

Superwoman Roo, goes hole digging with her, large dark pussy aka candle holder, yes another word for Lady Garden (10), 20-40, 10. Evens stevens.

Foghorn's cavernous candle holder doesn't bare thinking about.

Blues -45

Terrible sale.

Reds up: pencil box makes 20, tea caddy, Tea caddy makes 20, Them saws ensure a Golden Gavel with a profit of 45.

Bids on the sheets, as well as other staining fluid no doubt.

D1kko BB is another lovely box, a novelty biscuit tin (24), Tash beaming, 20-40, c'mon buy me estimate says Caroline, everyone else runs away screaming, straight in at a profit, 35. Males 11. Top work Madders.

Reds +96 +GG

Great Stuff Richard.

Looks like Roo needs warming up.

Eyes left for a very Full House



Boo Roo's Growler kick gets blocked off.

 

Shocking vase price
Cat shldve done better too

At least that fab caddy did ok

 

I think the workbench price was even worse!

 

Well played Reds, but I do feel Blues were a little unlucky.

Another lovely box!

 

ha, was just about to post same; very vintage Air France.

Mmm, Roo speaking French... or doing it.

 

Madeley keeps up his brilliant run.

 

Bienvenue au Mile High Club

 

Live Long And Prosper or Stay Long and Hard ...... I'll get me coat.

 

This has been discussed twice before with much chattery about the tw@ttery in May last year and in Nov the year before .......

Reg:
I did enjoy seeing the Vampire slaying kit, chiefly, Bible, crucifix, and fang extractor.



Timmy:
Princess riding Cliff Railway. Lucky Cliff!

Reg:
Strictly Tash in her element with her enormous BH Rule Book. She's loving it. That striped top suits here.



Red BAME brothers. Are they twins? One of them is Cabin crew. Really?

If you said cabin crew and twins, you expect something completely different. Stereotypical trolley dollies not an elderly geezer wheeling the pickle tray.

Retired Friend are Blue Team. Good to see a mobility impaired person for once.

Madders and Roo.

Timmy:
Quite an accurate description I'd say..

Reg:
Modified or re-puroosed/Hand-decorated

Roo with a big beaming smile says she's Grumpy.

Are your bellows working correctly?

Roo booted and ready for fondling and probing. Cough. The items that is.



I like the item over there says Blue Team, and the sign too.



The Thigh's the Limit



A site for Saw eyes. Arf, arf.

We do like a vice say Blues.

I have many of those laughs Roo. Gulp. We'll talk about that later!!!!!!



The Blues were soft like butter after the shop. Surely hard as solid oak like the Workbench.

She might buy something naughty just for fun. Cough. Splutter.

The Dummy is willing to be taken for a straight 69. Roo's wearing her Purple Boots. The Dummy's Arms fall off in excitement.

That Dummy's other part will be activated after Roo handles him.



Reds have bought, nice Indian box (no not Roo) , tea caddy, decorated saw.

We'll have to touch it, it's gorgeous. No, that's the other team Reds.

Blues buy wall hangings, ceramic vase, workbench with vices.

You quite enjoyed it, with Roo by your side, says Natasha. Not arf.

Tash discovers the Met's special cupboard under the stairs.



OT78:
She wants special punishment; look, she's even wearing a cartoon-crim SWAG top.

Reg:
Another large Distractee. They certainly find them.

Distraction lady is one who loves to lunch. Get the Harpoon ready.



Jeez it's a Foghorn Auction. Lordy. She loves all things French. Yoikes!!!!!

The usual OAP Zonbie Audience.



What!!!! Really!!!! Oh fark right off. It's a decent workbench not a sodding central island for the kitchen.

OT78:
exactly! Silly cow.

Reg:
Eurgh, what is she wearing.



Roo dressed like a Trolly Dolly.

Blues on first. Something's afoot.

Wall hangings profit, vase loss, workbench loss. Hopeless Auctioneering as expected.

Bids on the sheets.

Roo's showing off her large dark pussy, her special gift aka BB is a metal cat tea-light holder. Nice lap warmer.



She paid a tenner. Surely Bawley can't mess this up.

WE HAVE THIS GORGEOUS PUSSY!!!!!!!

She fails to get a profit. Pussy wiped on face.

Blues -45.

Reds now.

Pencil box makes a profit. Lovely Indian box.

OT78:
What a gorgeous Indian box!
But enough of Roo's undercarriage...what a gorgeous Indian tea box!

Reg:
Madders Masterstrokes at a terrible Bawley Blunderclass.

Tea caddy profit. GG?

Decorated saw sings to a 45 profit. Golden Gavel. Excellent work Madders.

His BB is a novelty metal biscuit tin.

Another lovely box screams the Reds.

Jericho loves it. So we have our suspicions.

Surely she can't balls this up as well.

Straight in at 35, 40. It makes 11.

Reds +96. At a Hawley Auction. That is outstanding!!!!

Superb Tash Growler kick.



For once they were spending at a Foghorn Auction.

OT78:
marvellous episode.
Characterful contestants, some top items, spondulicks flowing...
And two lovely blackhaired BH bombshells

Reg:
Excellent entertainment.

GGs, Tash in bondage for the theme, Roo looking lovely in purple boots and making a joke about her vices, Madders on top form, 2 decent teams, terrible Hawley outfit and matching Auction.

Lovely side-look and eyebrow raise.





Timmy:
Phwoarrr!!

Moog:
My word CH is godawful. Absolute torture

Guy:
You've got to wonder if she hams things up just because the TV camera's are there

She is woeful as an expert and an auctioneer

Reg:
She actually started off her appearances in earlier series well. She was much quieter and dressed more subdued. However, at some point, she must have gone on a course or hired a media advisor who suggested shouting and dressing loudly, would raise her profile, and get her better paid work.

Moog:
Madley and the Reds played very well. Good work gentlemen.

Reg:
Some great Jug fondling today.



Hail Hawley!!!



Tomorrow, Roo demonstrates her skill at breathing new life into a clapped-out old banger. There's hope for us all!!!



OT78:
arf!

Tash talks truncheons and handcuffs. Golly.

Great box. (The Reds' lot, not Tash's.)

Vg ep. And bravo Madders! (A rate ejaculation.)

Tash in cell in stripey top!
Presumably swag bag and mask taken by desk sergeant.

Accomplice still at large...



Reg:



Looks almost like a Bath Robe.

 

Bonus Extra.

OT78:
Great day.
Top BH, defeats last night for PSG and MK Dons, and yet more farce at Westminster.
Plus the sun is finally out in force here in France, and i saw my first beach bird in a bikini of the season.
Plus French telly showed this after lunch, in glorious restored HD. After 'Dr No: can you tell what it is yet?







Reg:





Don't forget The Blue Max.



The Destiny Angel Puppet in Captain Scarlet was also based on Ursula Andress. Lucky Captain Scarlet.

 

David Walliams in Drag?

 

Geoffrey Hughes wheeling and dealing.

 

Clarkson takes it easy or should that be easily.