Bargain Hunt

‘You filthy animal’. Merry Christmas!

 

You quote one of my Christmas jumpers my friend.

 

Maybe a tad early for the "review of the year", but who cares; I think this has to win the post of the year as far as I'm concerned

 

reviewing the Christmas episodes - subtitles guy did me proud again....

 

Are the Blues today (NYE) a couple of panto Dames?

 

Oh yes they are!!!

 

Happy new year folks! Heres to loads more laughs bargains and fun frolics through 2025!

 

Happy New Year Everybody!!!!!

 

The Princess in Pictures.



Cough and Double Cough, including another from the Welsh Rugby Shirt Fantasy Collection.



What's the Title of that Book, How I Went Blind? Talk about taking Muttley for a lie down with you. Is it time for Tiffin? Cough.

 

What a f f f fine start to the new year. Yes? Yeaaaassssssss!

 

Ok, so it's actually a clip from ART running backwards, where she actually stands and pulls the dress down, but who cares? I'm not complaining!

 

Watching today's shortened show. Just noticed, back then they showed the teams the BB before anything went to auction.

 

Eric getting clocky. Vaguely remember this Intro.

Shortie.

Racecourse of course off course.

Pervy Dave and Gary. Bottom of the barrel episode.

No bouncing Intros.

Is this the Wedgwood Watford one?

Yup, Royal Doulton and Watford Wedgwood, still can’t find out anything about the latter.



Reds mother used to be a ballet dancer. Best not to do that now.

Eric is standing to attention, in more ways than one, on hearing ceramic royalty.



Her son Mongo, he just pawn in the game of life, and he collects comics. So, having a girlfriend is only a very remote possibility. Good job as he would flatten her.



From Sheffield, so South Yorks skinflints.

Blue Bird was a dinner lady at a primary school who now works in the office, counting the crockery. Oh yeah, Uncle Eric’s Mum was a Dinner Lady like Victoria Wood. Is that why he loves sausages.

Son Jonty molests farm animals.

Scary Doll time



WTF was Battle Board.



Dave boring his team already.

Nagging Blue Mum.

Decent haggling for the 11 note footy table. Blue ratbag not impressed.

Green man for Mongo.

Blue dinner lady is a nightmare.

Is it hand-blown asks Pervy Dave as his glasses steam up.

Swinging Sixties says Dave, referencing the Grab-a-Granny club he hopes to score in tonight.

Knackered child’s toy has the industrial look Gary likes i.e. shiiit

Industrial lamp mixing bowls.

Hand beaten, lectures Dave while indulging in a pocket w@ank

Shopping is brief in this shortie.

Gary spots Scandi porn, I mean brooches.

They buy 3 for 85.

Reds buy: green man, glass vase, copper bowl

Blues buy: table footy, industrial lights, Scandi brooches

Where is the Auction. Fark it’s Rick Wakeman. Disaster pending.

The Colin catchphrase is released as quickly as Watford concede these days.



Green man dud, vase should be ok, copper bowl might struggle.

Dave’s BB is a wrought-iron garden marker (35), 10-30.

Give it a tug, says Eric. Dave already has.

Table footy should be fine, aluminium industrial lamps, they are awful, in with a shout, Scandi jewellery, Colin is happy with what they paid, but will his room of misers stump up that sort of cash.

Gary BB is framed photo of an assassinated Russian Tsarina, perhaps it contains Polonium. The Russians still enjoy bumping off their folks to this day. Suitably creepy from Gary (10), binware frame evidently, 5-15.

Oh dear look at this lot.



Reds up first, no surprises then, green man, creep up, amazingly wipes arse, glass vase makes 10, copper bowl makes a fiver. Blimey, almost a GG. That marker BB, they REJECT, Dutch start, sells for 20, loss of 15. It was slipware.

Reds +15, which would have been wiped out if they went with Dave, so good decision.

Blues now, footy table makes a profit of 4, lamp shades start at 5 LOL, they lose 11, Gary’s first meme, Scandi brooches, another Dutch start at 30, climb to a wipe arse sale price. Gary Meme 2.

Bradley Walsh is on his knees, The Chase Is Painful.



BB time, the creepy photo, starts at a pound, makes a profit, Gary meme 3 as he celebrates a cup final winner, he almost has a heart attack, meme 4, as a profit of 8 is made.



Blues +1

Amazing scenes as Gary’s Team makes a 100 pence profit.

 

June last year, was the time we wistfully wasted waffling about this edition ........

OT78:
Shortened Sunday with Gary Pe

Redbird used to work for Royal Doulton! The BH equivalent of a ringer?

Ooh some nice Scandi enamel spotted.

Proper Sheffield ogre is Redbloke. Bouncer potential. Reg will be flashing back to student nightclub days.

Lovely glass vase. But Colin doesn't like! (Not able to empathise with female POV?)

Gary Pe's BB is a hilarious hodgepodge. Reg will doubtless have words.

Reg:
Shorty episode that was on not that long ago. Tsk and Tut, lazy BBC schedulers.

The clock episode with Uncle Eric and that weird butch woman which luckily we don’t see.

Some people have bought their caravans to the fair, yet it’s not that kind of fair.

Pre-Challenge days, Mother and Son teams.

Oh, yeah, Watford Wedgwood lady. Never could find any info about that.

Eric stands to attention. In what way?



Big names he says.

Yer Watford , only the biggest name on the planet. Melded with Wedgwood, that’s me that is.

Eric says his Mum was a Dinner Lady. Might explain his love of white nondescript china, love of stodgy puddings and lack of height through nutrition. All that poor cold cheese pie.

Blue Jonty works on the farm.

What’s stops the teams bolting with the 300 notes.

Pervy Dave and Gary. 2 of the poorest.

11 notes for ANY Table top footy game is a bargain.

Green Man, don’t walk into a loss.

Planters, they’re not very old says Gary. Are they modern?, says sharp as a tack Blue Mum. Yes, that’s what not old means.

Do you like bright colours says DayGlo. Well try these mushrooms, I also take a few when I go on BH he says.

So if there’s no pontil mark then it’s hand blown glass and if there is a pontil mark then it’s hand blown glass. I’m confused.

Do you love it Pauline? , he asks Red Mum.

Dave now creepily pays compliments to the female stallholder.

A sad looking Ted riding a sad looking wheelie Horse. That’s just Gary all over.



Sodding industrial lamps, spotlights. Groan.

Dealer goes to shake Gary’s hand and there is a delay. Has Gary had a premonition of the future?

Red Manchild is distracted by US comic books. Go and find something with Continental in the title instead.

Looks like the Devil’s steel drum, played while you roast on a fork down below, or it’s a Balti dish from the Moon.



DayGlo gives them a lecture. The whole fair falls asleep.

Manchild says he would buy it, but he is easily pleased.

Scandi Leaf brooches. Nice but they may have overspent.

Reds, green man light, glass vase, copper bowl from the moon.

The chat with the team and expert is edited down to what was the spend. Brutal editing.

Blues, table footy, industrial lights, Scandi brooches.

Rick Wakeman Auction. Losses guaranteed.

Is there anything edible for Daughter Kirsty. Possibly the Green Man sign. Eat, Don’t Eat.

The vase. Very much a style of its own. Not exactly words of endorsement.

Dave’s BB is a measuring line marker. There was one of those not so long ago. Probably worth a tenner. He paid 35. LOL.

Blue’s probably have the better items.

Gary has bought a photo frame of the last Tsarina signed by Vladimir Putin.

On closer inspection it’s an old cigarette card stuffed into a not very old silver-plated holder. It could be an Xmas cracker item if you could fit it in. So typical of Gary.



Redeemed by the price and not the object says Colin of Gary’s BB.

The usual bunch of Misers at the Wakeman Auction Wake.



Reds’s up.

Green man sign it’s lot 110. So they may well have spent all their money by now.

A partially hidden Iain Duncan-Smith puts in a bid. Let the coughing start.



Face is wiped. Actually a result here.

That glass vase.

Dutch Auction. Makes a tenner.

Weird bowl. Makes a fiver.

Is that Hilary Benn holding it up.



DayGlo’s BB is Rejected. 15 notes. As expected. Would have lost them 20.

Reds +15, would have been -5 if they went with that tat.

Blues now.

Footy game 4 profit.

In showing the item a ball trundles towards the goal and hits the post. Sums it up.

Big industrial lamp shades, loses 11.

The Scandi brooches. Face wiped again.

Gary’s BB next. Snigger. Starts at a pound but actually sells for 18. Massive 8 note profit.

Blues end +1 LOL.

Low scoring, as in Grab-A-Granny Thursday night cheap nightclub disco, Wakeman Wakey Wakey Auction.

At least it’s a decent Kick to finish.

 

Re-up from June 2024 and a re-re-up from October 2023 with additions.
BBC approved preamble:
Southwell 3
Series 47-49 (Shortened Versions)
https://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/m001s096
Today’s show comes to you from the Southwell Racecourse Antiques Fair in Nottinghamshire. Presenter Eric Knowles and experts Gary Pe and David Harper help to guide the way as the teams have £300 to spend on 3 items they hope will make them a profit at the auction in Lincoln. The blues can’t agree while the reds pick out an unusual item.

Shortened version of
Southwell 1
Series 49
https://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/b09pw1qt
Eric Knowles presents from the Southwell Racecourse Antiques Fair in Nottinghamshire. Experts Gary Pe and David Harper guide the way as teams have £300 to spend on three items they hope will make them a profit at the auction in Lincoln. The blues can't agree while the reds pick out an unusual item. Eric also visits the Museum of Timekeeping to find out how certain clocks changed the way we worked.

The Translation:
Today's episode is a shortened version of Series 49 Southwell 1, not covered before, but its data had been obtained and added to the database. It's a scary clock ticking intro, ironically after we discussed such things a la Ten Little Indians and The Beast Must Die yesterday. The irony is not lost. With no time to spare, Uncle Eric is thrust onto 2 teams, no emblazoned captions, no challenges, with barely any time to meet the experts, who just happen to be DayGlo and Gary, 2 of the bad ones and a pre-Rick Wakeman, Auctioneer Rick Wakeman, so minimal profits too. Good job it's a quickie compared to the much longer and bigger Christina episode yesterday.

The Staff:
[Gaffer] Uncle Eric Knowles, a safe pair of hands.
[Red Team Expert] Dayglo David Harper, the Teeside Tat Trouserer
[Blue Team Expert] Gary PeePee, Bonus Buyus Bizarrus Sh1ttus
[Auctioneer] Colin Rapido Young, pre-Rick Wakeman short-haired variant
[Auction Location] Golding Young & Mawer, Lincs
[Miserlin Rating] Approved

​

The Teams:
[Red Team] Retired former ballet dancer Mother and American Comic Collector Very Northern Son, Mongo, I assume he has no partner, she used to work for Watford Wedgwood, what was that, can't find anything about it.
[Blue Team] Former Dinner Lady Mother, a cross between Grayson Perry and Georgina Hale from Ken Russell's The Devils and her Farmer Son.

​

The Shopping:
Reds: Green man street light (65) topend, Multicoloured hand-blown glass vase (12) not bad, Arts & Crafts copper bowl set (45) topend.
Blues: A table football (11) OK, 3 Aluminium industrial lights (29) OK, 3 enamel brooches (85) good.

The Distraction:
Not shown here. Eric also visits the Museum of Timekeeping to find out how certain clocks changed the way we worked. Originally, it was an item about clocking-in clocks.

​

Here Eric meets Tegan Jovanka from Dr Who. She's been stuck their since the 1980s and is wondering if Eric is going to grope her arse and ask her to make the tea while he waits for the male expert to arrive.

​

The Auction:
Reds: Green man street light (evens stevens), Multicoloured hand-blown glass vase (10 profit), Arts & Crafts copper bowl set (5 profit).
DayGlo's BB is a Wrought-iron garden marker (35), 10-30 REJECTED, 15. A 20 note loss, it was such a crap item.

​

Blues: A table football (4 profit), 3 Aluminium industrial lights (11 loss), 3 enamel brooches (evens stevens).
Gary's BB is a Framed photo of Tsarina Alexandra Armstrong (10), 5-15, 18. It makes an 8 quid profit but what a shiiit item. Truly bizarre. Truly Pointless!!

​

The Aftermath:
Uncle Eric on so briefly that he hardly had time to get going. Red Manchild Mongo and his ballet dancing china industry Mum. Another Mum and Barnyard Blue Jonty. Terrible Colin Young Auction in front of the usual assortment of Living Dead. 2 of the worst experts, the Pervy Teesider and Gary The Hopeless. Once again it's the default Dutch-style Wakeman Auction. Start high and then plummet. No big spend Challenge so minimal risk, though to be fair Gary's Blues chanced their arm with the jewellery at 85 notes which broke even. A ridiculously short episode, so no time to develop any rhythm. The Reds hardly break the bank and almost get a Golden Gavel. Some really ugly items topped off by DayGlo's bin-ready garden marker which they sensibly reject and save their 15 pound profit. Most of Gary's Blue Team's items are equally as bad, including another truly horrendous Gary BB, a Tsarina framed photo Xmas cracker bogey item which makes a profit and they finish with a one GBP surfeit. A stunning success. The saving grace of all the items were the decent enamel brooches which broke even. It's not the end of the world says Eric after the loss on the industrial lights. Well, that usually comes after Gary's BB. All the episodes they could have shown, they chose this one. The only thing of note was that Gary actually made an overall profit, remember this day.

​

Does anyone know what Watford Wedgwood is or was? I can't find anything about it online. I assume it's the polar opposite to L*t*n Toilet Bowls.

​

The BH Confessional, one of Cardinal Young's misers admits to spending more than a ten pound note. She is forced to rapidly recite 10 Hail Mary's in penance.

​

The Hi-Kick:
Standard indoor kick. A decent kick from everyone with good coordination. Yes, YES!!

​

 

They used to do this along with no Challenges and the non-jumping around Intros, in these earlier Series.

 

Why don’t you show us what you can do, says Tash, as half the population gently groans in appreciation

The positives,Tight Titty Topped Tash looking fab, beaming radiantly from her luscious mane. Ian, Clive, and porcelain dealer Val, all giving very generous discounts from their Hele Antique Centre. Bingo, it’s John, one of the more affable experts with his Thumping Tash Tempting Ticker under increased strain. His BB is really good and unusual.

The negatives, dreadful Mumbling Mary the hopeless Auctioneer, she would struggle selling gold to Auric Goldfinger. The hapless Danny The Squeak, jabbing his finger, gibbering like an imbecile, most of the glass and china will have developed cracks after his Helium ejaculations. Two poor teams, a pair of screeching harridans, the Red one in particular, would laugh hysterically at her own shadow, and a real idiotic sounding Northern Blue Bloke. A Fool and his money ………



Tash getting excited by the Distraction item, luckily she manages to find somewhere Private.



Another Distraction Lady gives advice to all the male watchers.



More rude filth lurking in the Centre.



There's a sense of foreboding at the start of the Auction.



Warren Gatland in the Audience. He's heard there are Bargains Galore here.



Blue Bird was an extra in Ken Russell's The Devils.



Tash shows off her famous finger dance moves.

 

Previously on Bargain Hunt, last Jan, and July 2022, to be precise ........

Reg:
Oh no, Mumbling Mary.

Covid wasteland special.

Urrrgggh. Pony tail alert.

The Red's like a bit of wood. Don't we all.

Tash things Red Lady is her Auntie Joyce.

Tash, Call me Uncle. Cough.

The Squeaking Squawk and Bingo.

Red crone loves an object. Is it glass? No, ceramic. Ooooh she says. Is it Daulton asks The Squeak? Oh, it's now boring. Strewth.

2 Teams of Brainiacs.

Generous discounts here. I remember this place before. They do do good discounts here.

Trouble is, it doesn't matter what discounts they get, Mumbling Mary will make them irrelevant.

There is obviously a reason why she only did these set of 4 programmes i.e. she is beyond terrible.

LOl. The Managers have a sense of humour. Another reasonable discount.

Pony-tailed idiot is so gullible. He will believe anything. What a numpty.

Tash is the new BH Dr Klahn in their remake of Kentucky Fried Movie's Fistful of Yen. Send the Auction to Detroit!!!



Timmy:
line of the day so far from squeaky, "its always got these numbers, these West German numbers on the bottom".

OT78:
1870188919141939600000019541966197419891990

Reg:
Along with the Totenkopf mark alongside.



Standby for how not to Auction some items.

You've got your work cut out says Tash = These items really are overpriced shiit

Mummble, mumble, mumble. Thump.

Loss of 42.

Mummble, mumble, mumble. Thump.

It actually breaks even. It could have been worse says Tash.

Mummble, mumble, mumble.. 10 pounds, Thump.

Loss of 2.

Squeak BB are a pair of skip-rescued white metal candlesticks. 26 notes. That's an overspend of 30 notes. Should be paying to dispose of them.

Mumble, mumble, Adore them. Mumble. Bargain. Mumble.

Dutch Auction time.

Mumble 38 mumble.

Huge 12 note profit. W00-Hoo.

Minus 32 overall.

Blue turmoil next.

I liked it as an item says Blue Bird. As opposed to like it as a thought???

Mummble, mumble, mumble. 35 pounds, Thump.

-40 on the first item.

Tiffany lamp, Mummble, mumble, mumble. 65 pounds, Thump.

30 loss

Mumble Globe Mumble, mumble, mumble. 70 pounds, Thump.

40 loss.

Bingo's BB for 20 or under, is a novelty coffee grinder measuring tape.

Mumble, mumble, mumble, look good anyway.

Mumble, mumble, mumble, 32, mumble, 40, Thump.

Blimey they doubled their money.

Overall -90.

Told you it would be bad and it was truly mumble, mumble, woeful.

Red crone squawking like a D1ckens demented asylum patient.

Moog:
Work experience girl on the rostrum today. Think both teams have over spent on a few items but this Gen Z loser isn't gonna help them.

Seriously, the personality of a snotty tissue. Hansen she ain't.

Chest of little drawers doing better than expected. Horrible German vase did as badly as anticipated.

She doesn't even bring the gavel down with any conviction. I feel cheated.

Don't let this little rat bag sell for the teams again. It's a huge handicap.

Squeaky has a pair of candlesticks. Look like shiiit but cheap enough. Will probably break even/small loss IMO.

Teenager Mary thinks 60-80.

Let's see if she can suck the wind out of the bidders' sails with her gutless delivery.

38 so neither of us right. Well done Squeaky Dan.

Glass bottle - massively ocerspent. 75 quid.

Teenager thinks 20-30.

35 hammer price.

Next up is the Tiffany style lamp for 95. I suspect a win here.

Miked2006:
Think you forgot to log into your Reg account Moog?

Moog:
They were still bidding, but the teenager got bored because they are crippled by social media to have a tiny attention span and just brought the hammer down at 65.

Globe for 110. Again bids were still going but teenage mary brings gavel down super quick at 65 I think. I was typing this so I forgot.

John's delight is a novelty tape measure shaped like a coffee grinder. Looks cute. 20 quid paid.

20-30 estimater by juvenile juror. I concur.

Gets 40 quid.

Reg:
Posh new auction girl was dreadful. Assessment incoming.

Probably Daddy's little auction girl.

https://www.midweekherald.co.uk/news/bbc-bargain-hunt-team-visit-chilcotts-honiton-9099646

Timmy:
Liz Chilcott said: “We treated the items exactly as normal auction lots - and they were sold to the highest bidder, even if it was at a loss.”

makes mental note never to sell at Chilcotts. Won't be selling at Wessex either now Dizzies left.. probably won't be selling at "MMMbop's" either for a while ( I did actually contemplate applying for a job there last year though it would have meant relocating)

Reg:
https://www.chilcottsauctions.co.uk/team/

Looks like a good old BBC box-ticking exercise.

Moog:
Typical bloody looney left BBC!

Have to have a third rate young woman auctioneer on, rather than brilliant, white, heterosexual gavel genius H****n or brilliant white (maybe) heterosexual wizard Tim Weeks, or even Ravishing Raj Bisram, who gives the teams a fair crack with his madonna mic approach.

It's PC gone mad!

Keighley:
I would.

Reg:



Moog:
Can just imagine it 'ooh yeah harder harder' in her deadpan, awkward Gen Z monotone. Killing boners as quickly as she killed auction excitement.

 

Re-up from January 2024 and Re-Re-up from July 2022 with some additions.
BBC approved preamble:
Hele 13
Series 62
https://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/m00190l4
Natasha Raskin Sharp, experts Danny Sebastian and John Cameron and the teams go antique-hunting in Hele, before heading to Honiton for today’s auction. Natasha asks the public of Exeter about a unique mystery item.

The Translation:
Welcome to Hell, or should that be Hele in Devon. I assume this a new place for BH. Devon/Cornwall can be known as prime Miser country but let's wait and see. I'm sure Hell has strict rules so who better to investigate them than Strict Natasha. Beware for a ticking off and DQing Lucifer. The BH Demons of the Day are The Squeak who's voice will torment you for eternity and Marine Boy Bingo who will show you his nautical collection for your eternal torment. Hell's Auctioneer today is red-haired newbie, Mary Chilcott, who has taken a new direction after overseeing the inquiry into Iraq. The youngest Auctioneer I've ever seen but she does seem posh, twenty to thirt-eh, she chirrups. It's in Honiton in Devon, so the Skinflints will be out of their lairs in force, hence the immediate one-star Miserlin Rating.

The Staff:
[Gaffer] Strict Natasha Raskin Sharp
[Red Team Expert] Danny Dogwhistle and Squeaky Toy Sebastian, he of the aged and distressed voice
[Blue Team Expert] John Marine Boy Cameron
[Auctioneer] Posh Mumbling Mary Chilcott
[Auction Location] Chilcotts, Honiton
[Miserlin Rating] One Star

The Teams:
[Red Team] Married handyman and shop assistant ball and chain.
(Challenge: Functional piece of porcelain cue toilet humour, point Percy at it etc.)
[Blue Team] Married couple, he looks like he could have been in New Model Army. Is he wearing clogs?
(Challenge: Blown glass)

​

The Shopping:
Reds: West German vase (52) overspent, Shabby tat-tastic 19th Century miniature Chester Drawers, blame Arthur (80) oh dear overspent, Meissen onion design tea cup (12 Challenge) OK
Blues: Nailsea glass novelty flask (75 Challenge) overspent, Tiffany style lamp (95) overspent, Vintage Philips Challenge globe (110) overspent.

The Distraction:
Mystery object time. Treen fruit wood. Looks like a vintage wooden double-ender with male and female ends. It's a sheath sharpener. Reaping and Hell, it all starts to come together. Good job Charl-eh Ross isn't presenting, as the Donald Pleasance figure in the cowl might be a-visiting.

​

The Auction:
Reds: West German vase (42 loss), Shabby tat-tastic 19th Century miniature Chester Drawers, blame Arthur (evens stevens), Meissen onion design tea cup (2 loss).
Squeak's BB is a pair of rescued skipware white metal Art Nouveau candlesticks, real tat (26) but posh youngster values them at 60-80, gulp, 38, a small profit of 12 GBP for Helium Harry. Back to the bins with you.

​

Blues: Nailsea glass novelty flask (40 loss), Tiffany style lamp (30 loss), Vintage Philips Challenge globe (40 loss).
Bingo's BB is a novelty coffee grinder tape measure (20), 20-30, could be OK, 40, doubled its money. Well done John Boy.

​

The Aftermath:
Empty Covid blasted Antiques Centre, but at least this time we have 2 managers, Clive and Ian, who offer decent discounts rather than the default 10% off. They've turned up in later series, with Steph and Bingo, and helped bring about decent profits, but this was at a much better Auction house, not like this Series and today. Yet again, it's another location and yet another awful wannabe auctioneer. Valuations all over the place. No charisma. She barely tries to sell the item. Bugger all patter. She can't even sell a bit of Meissen for over a tenner. Shocking. In Ebeneezer's holiday home both teams were on a hiding to nothing and both teams overspent and made losses, particularly the Blues. Both experts spent conservatively and this was the secret to making a profit on their items. Mumble, mumble, mumble, THUMP!!!!

​

The Hi-Kick:
Indoor Covid diagonal kick. As usual Strict Natasha jumps the gun, she should be DQed, both Reds poor, both Blues done good. Thankfully, Dan Dan Squeaksonic man is too close to the camera to give us the full crotch shot, but we do get a grim sweaty armpit. Yes, YES!!

​

 

The wfcfcbh disco SETLIST 1 (updated) ......

I have the the first 5 tracks for the setlist. Listen while watching the babes, or join in ..........

 

The wfcfcbh disco SETLIST 2 (updated) ......

Only 5 media links per post allowed so here are the next 5 in the setlist

Remember, listen while watching the babes, or join in ..........

 

BBC going back into the archives a bit today.

Shrewsbury 10
Bargain Hunt Series 61

Previously shown April 2022. Just Dizzies 2nd appearance on the show, with princess C presenting and Muttley with the opposition. Auction is in Lichfield which surely means the Dalek. Whats not to like.

I'll try to be around

 

"who doesnt like something that's french?" coos Dizzy
ohlala!
alors, viens avec moi, cherie!

(btw, Bonne année, everyone)

She then calls herself a Cheeky Girl..
uh-oh, don't let Lembit Opik near her

She talks about blowing a french horn...oh, too easy.

Oddly enough, I was once married to a professional french horn player. You can imagine my internal monologue when we met...

 

Muttley magnificently mugging to the camera..

 

arf, Phil! "Big and lumpy".

that bbc sign is tempting.

"Does anyone want to be polishing a horn?" asks Richard of Princess.

 

Ooh, the sign flies! Good start to my new year predictions.

Amazed re cutlery.

Hilarious Princess barking at Phil!
He has last laugh, though.

Do keep saying sugar nips, sugar t1ts. It is making my french horn shiny. No Brasso needed.
Speaking of old brasses that probably need cleaning, what about those Reds?

Curious BB from Dizzy, who is promising to apply heat that will 'soothe aches and pains'. Do we have anything that aches for her heat, Timmy?

 

Oh very much so....

(Bonne annee to you too! btw)

 

Masterclass by Team Bagpuss today. Izzie's team shown up.

The Litchfield auction is the truest test of BH in my opinion. Neither falsely inflated like Wessex nor hopeless and forlorn like Malvern.

Great episode and a real example of how wrong things can go or right, depending on just a small decision here and there.

 

just trying to remember what was in brackets after the title of their hit Cheeky song (???)

 

First-time repeat since it's original broadcast in April 2022.
BBC approved preamble:
Shrewsbury 10
Series 61
https://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/m00164f5
Christina Trevanion is in Shrewsbury, where experts Philip Serrell and Izzie Balmer lend a hand to the reds and blues before they battle it out at auction in Lichfield. Christina learns the inspirational story of wildlife artist Mouse Macpherson.

The Translation:
Horny Honey Blonde Fox Christina Trevanion is in Shrewsbury, where it's p1ss1ng it down in a soggy field. She is joined by the weathered Philip Muttley Serrell, the Landfill Lounge Lizard avec scarf de tat et pullover de moth, parading his Shabbie Extraordinaire range, and the very fresh-faced Dripping Dizzie Izzie Lizzy Balmer. Auction house is in Lichfield's, which means Auctioneer is Skaro's own Richard 'Ex-sterrr-minnnate' Winterton, barking out bids like a coked-up Jeff Stelling. Online only auction. Boooooooo. Prospects are diminished.

The Staff:
[Gaffer] Sizzling steamstress Christina Trevanion
[Red Team Expert] Philip Muttley Serrell avec scarf de tat et pull-over de moth
[Blue Team Expert] Izzie Lizzie Barmy Balmer, Virgo or close to Virgo appearance
[Auctioneer] Richard Winterton, the Davros of the Auction World
[Auction Location] Skaro, Lichfield
[Miserlin Rating: Unlisted]

Dizzie Davros



King Mut of Tat



You can't beat a bit of Temptress Tongue

​

The Teams:
[Red Team] Waitress and Management Consultant Friends, one on a mobility scooter (BBC Diversity box ticked), I loik glarse, Yam, Yam, Yam, trundle to a bundle.
(Challenge: Starting with B)
[Blue Team] Enthusiastic Hugh Dennis Carpenter and Teacher Lee Mack not twin brothers, On-Trend cliche mentioned, ding. I'm sure wood will be very much in evidence with the girls around.
(Challenge: Starting with H, BH geddit!)

The Shopping:
Reds: BBC cast iron sign (Challenge 44) OK, Moss Agate handled Victorian silver christening set (99) should do it, Vintage metal banded trunk (38), on-trend cliche (ding).
Blues: Early 20th Century trunk (52) too rich, French Hunting Horn (15) OK, Mid-Century Sewing Table (78) ***** ugh ouch.

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The Distraction:
Christina learns the inspirational story of wildlife artist Mouse Macpherson. The Princess finds out about wildlife artist Mouse Macpherson who had a sad and tragic end caught in a trap while hunting some cheese.

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The Auction:
Reds: BBC cast iron sign (66 profit), Moss Agate handled Victorian silver christening set (21 profit) GG incoming?, Vintage metal banded trunk (42 profit) Golden Gavel attained, Blimey!
Muttley's BB is 1930s solid silver Wishbone sugar nips, which sounds more like a nickname than an item (35), (20-30), 50 quid. A 15 quid profit. Excellent performance.

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Blues: Early 20th Century trunk (2 loss), French Hunting Horn (10 profit), Mid-Century Sewing Table (48 loss) no profit for the plywood.
Dizzie's BB is an industrial-style heat lamp (50), on-trend (ding) (15-25), 30. It looks crappy and during a generous Auction it makes a 20 note loss. Tut-tut. Back to the industrial drawing board for you Dizzie Izzie.

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The Aftermath:
Another one from the p1ssing down at Shrewsbury set. A moist, Dirty Laughing Princess, looking top notch, talking about a monstrous gape. Cough of Coughs. Dalek Auction, plunger down during valuations despite the Empress being opposite, in full barking, arm-flinging mode. Muttley with 2 middle-aged biddies, who are actually OK. One’s on a mobility scooter that gets stuck in a water-logged tent. Phil is on-form, mugging to the camera with ease. His lot make a fat profit on the BBC sign thing, and the Christening set, which he tasked his team to check they had the same marks to confirm it was a genuine set, started slowly but soon climbed to a steady profit. The battered but on-trend trunk (cliche bell ping) confirmed their Golden Gavel with an excellent profit. A clean sweep resulted with Muttley’s rather nice silver wishbone sugar nips, thankfully these were the only nips exposed for the Reds. They finish 144 quid up with a GG. Superb work, which demonstrates that when he is good, he is very good. Dizzie gets the male non-twins. Must have been an arduous labour lasting years or perhaps not. One of them hopes to get a birthday horn ripe for blowing. The Blues concur they love a bit of French. There was a bit of bickering so the shop took longer than it should resulting in a rushed big spend. Never a good sign. This seems to be one of Dizzie’s earliest appearances where she is really finding her feet, and it shows with the purchases. Their trunk just falls short but they’re soon into a small profit with the French hunting horn, which nobody blew. However, they are well and truly sunk when the rushed sewing table, which the Dalek dismally dismissed as plywood, got exterminated at the auction for 30 notes, a loss of 48. Will Dizzie rescue them with her BB? A big fat nope, as the terrible up-cycled heat lamp turns cold with a 20 note loss. Blues end well down on 60. Ooops. A Muttley Masterclass contrasting with a Dripping Dizzie Disasterclass. A fine, entertaining episode, with a seismic crevasse. What’s not to like.

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The Hi-Kick:
Indoor Covid diagonal special, reasonably executed. It's On-Trend (Ding). The Princess' Growler kick is just about visible over the scooter handlebars. Yes, YES!!

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Something about an Arse, a metaphor for the Blue Brothers.

 

Lobby cards aka Hello Boys!!:

 

nice dance move...