Bargain Hunt

Sniff, sniff, oh it's Japanese silver, inferior quality, sniffs Dully.

 

Massive loss incoming on the stuffed polar bears

 

Picard Lives and is doing Auctions.

 

His mate has gone on holiday to play rugby rather than go to the auction? Total disrespect. Ought to be disqualified.

 

Squeak's Skipware 1960s pendant light is truly dreadful. Plenty of fools in London.

 

Yeah that bull is also going to lose plenty

 

McWitch must have a whole can of hairspray on that Barnet.

 

Ouch, those bears.

 

Load of overspending today. Overall losses for both teams incoming IMO.

 

@mods can we get a daily SB for BH?

 

Ha ha ha polar bears £20!!!

 

Classic pottery comes up trumps again.

 

My stream is behind yours Clive! Spoilers!

 

Potential Squeak masterclass. Yup. He doesn't disappoint with crapness.

 

I actually thought the reds'd lose just under 3 figs but they've absolutely smashed through that ceiling. Only posh Totty's mugs bring them 2 figure loss respectability.

 

Those lights would be a cause of arguments between me and Mrs Moog as we'd argue over which of us should take them to the tip.

 

Thank you BH for lightening my grim mood after the match earlier.

 

When we moved into this house in 2012 we gutted it of 50s, 60s and 70s crap. Now I'm thinking we chucked thousands of pounds worth of Danny Sebastian tat into landfill.

 

A superb example of a bad presenting, experting and purchasing. Wonderful. Superbly edited into a condensed tin of Campbell's Cream of Crap.

 

It had all the wrong ingredients in thr BH matrix. New auction house (miser unrated), buying from a shop, not a boot sale, bad experts, bad presenter, idiot contestants.
Would not recommend

 

Ms. Viewing Partner asserts Catherine was hot for the ruggerb*gger. "Look: can't you see she's all pink and a-quiver?"
*shrugs* Feminine intuition. Never question it, unless you like the spare room.

 

"Campbell's Cream of Crap."

key ingredient today being Condensed Milf.

 

McWitch on her annual visit to meet The Addams Family.

 

BBC approved preamble:
Kingston
Bargain Hunt Series 47-49 (Shortened Versions)
https://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/m000lwzx
Anita Manning oversees today’s Bargain Hunt, which comes from Kingston-upon-Thames. Catherine Southon and Danny Sebastian are the experts helping today’s teams spend £300 on three items that might make a profit at auction in Chiswick.

The Translation:
After the earlier sh1teshow on BBC1, I was in 2 minds about watching BH let alone doing a write-up. I'm glad I did, as it lightened my grim mood. Just like following Watford over the years, losing a big game when you haven't done yourself justice farking hurts, think how crap losing the 1984 FA Cup Final against Everton felt, and that's close to how crap it gets. Being born in Watford and having an English Mum (and Welsh Dad, where my Hwyl comes from) I've always supported the England football team too, so it looks like only one of my teams will make it out of the group. However, my Welsh half's pride took a real battering today. Anyway, with McWitch, Dully, and The Squeak lining up as the BH Z-team, I couldn't resist. Oh yeah, Auction is with Picard in the 'Make It So' Auction Rooms. Phasers will be on stun to silence the aural attack from the Squeakmonster. "His profits are dead, Jim".

The Staff:
[Gaffer] Anita McWitch Manning
[Red Team Expert] Hyperdull uber-posh Catherine Southon, the Liz Truss of the Auction world
[Blue Team Expert] Danny Hypersqueak Sebastian, even dogs have to wear ear protectors
[Auctioneer] Mark Picard Longson, make it so
[Auction Location] London Auctions, Chiswick
(Miserlin Rating: Unlisted)

​

The Teams:
[Red Team] Rugby bromantic team mates
[Blue Team] Father & Daughter, armchair experts

The Shopping:
Reds: Japanese silver fans (75) topend, Deans cuddly polar bears (140) ouch, Pair of RAF cufflinks (70) OK.
Blues: Eggshellware cup and saucer (5) bargain, Continental silver salts and spoons (35) good, Decorative bull for the decorative bullsh1te (150) ouch, fingers in the fire.

The Distraction:
None. Short-arsed variant. Probably a good thing due to my impatient frustration.

The Auction:
Reds: Japanese silver fans (small loss), Deans cuddly polar bears (huge loss), Pair of RAF cufflinks (small loss).
Dully's BB are a pair of Keith Murray pottery tankards (15), 30-50, 50. Good profit on a nice item for once Dully.



Blues: Eggshellware Cup and saucer (evens stevens), Continental silver salts and spoons (small loss), Decorative bull for decorative bullsh1te (big loss).
Squeaky's BB is a classic Squeak Skipware 1960s pendant light (48), 40-60, 40, yes, another loss. LOL.



The Aftermath:
McWitch sarcastically false-laughing and gurgling like an overworked storm drain and slurring away like a concussed prize fighter grappling a deflating set of bagpipes. The Red Rugby Lads completely by-passed Dully. She did take every opportunity to molest them at every opportunity. Then for the Auction, one of them is so embarrassed he has to go to New Zealand to play Rugby. Instant DQ, complete lack of respect for the traditions of BH for having such a feeble excuse for a no-show. I'm sure Dully will be waiting for him when he comes back for more inappropriate "clutching". As expected, a big fat near 3-figure loss and only a BB profit. On to the Blues, as expected, no profits and a classic piece of Squeak ruBBish he rescued from a builders skip. Laughably awful, it didn't disappoint and sank like an Italian battleship. A Squeak Masterstroke of a performance resulting in a 3-figure loss. Well done Danny, don't call us, we'll call you.



The Hi-Kick:
Standard indoor kick. McWitch barely tries, as her and Dully, hang onto Red Bloke like lead weights. Still that's no excuses for barely getting your leg up. Blues on the other hand achieve par while The Squeak gives us partial paunch and crotch shot. Appetite suppression in action.

​

 

Or is a mobile one of the Paul Daniels variety. Eye of newt and toe of frog is more potent than Harmony hair spray. Is she or isn't she?

 

Stamped and sealed by the dreadful experts. Is the Squeak as bad as Tragicooper?

 

Dully: These are Tankards for beer drinking. You Rugby boys like that don't you. Go on have a good old quaff and take me over the oak desk in the corner.

 

Great episode. Love watching Danny plunge such depths in the Sea of Incompetence that we can't hear him squeak.

 

too early for a Sunday, this. still...

Gorgeous spoon!

(As would be Steph.)

 

Phil clearly *HATED* those two gobby thicko wimmin.
Mentioned their noise/chatter eight times.
We feel your pain, Phil.

 

well done, skandi spoon. and i won't spoil the sensational closer...
Great display from lovely Cockinmouth Steph.

 

Those Blue team women are annoying with that cackling.

 

Red Student: I've got to stick with my reindeer spoon.
Uncle Eric: OK. Fair enough.
Red Student: I see it going for £200, £300.
Uncle Eric: Oh, do you? God. Well, we've all had that dream.

Nice bit of dry wit Eric.

 

Bloody suitcases. It's a bit tatty says the lurker. Yup tatty tat. Broken handle too.

 

a proper LOL moment. he slyly delivered it so well.