1. reg_varney

    reg_varney Squad Player

    Golden Gavel for the Blues? Yup.
     
  2. OldTraff78

    OldTraff78 Reservist

    that was nailbiting!
    imjury-time penalty equivalent.
     
    reg_varney likes this.
  3. OldTraff78

    OldTraff78 Reservist

    Blimey. Tash rustling for loose change in her breast pockets.
    Any thrupenny bits in there, luv?
     
    reg_varney likes this.
  4. OldTraff78

    OldTraff78 Reservist

    Scratty Bluebird Heidi now has enough winnings money to buy herself some shampoo.
     
    reg_varney likes this.
  5. OldTraff78

    OldTraff78 Reservist

    Trilly's BB fabulous, it must be said.
    Good episode.
    And Carlos Whispa reliably not 'Fantastic!'
     
    reg_varney likes this.
  6. reg_varney

    reg_varney Squad Player

    BBC approved preamble:
    Builth Wells 2
    Bargain Hunt Series 63
    https://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/m001f0pl
    The market town of Builth Wells in Powys is the location for today’s programme. Natasha Raskin Sharp is in charge, with experts Ben Cooper and Kate Bliss helping the reds and blues spend £300 on three bargains. Natasha also visits the Radnorshire Museum to learn about the Welsh triple harp, considered to be the national instrument of Wales. As usual, there is great excitement at the auction, but which team will come out on top?

    The Translation:
    Previously on BH at Builth Wells ......, we were bog snorkelling with Strict Natasha, this time it's having a good twang on something between your legs. This time she badly pretends to play the Welsh Triple Harp. Instant DQ for her. She is joined by Ultra Soprano Shrilly Trilly and the tone deaf Ben Clod Tragicooper, the Abominable Showman. Auction is with Farmer Will, banging the gavel inbetween tugging on the teats of his prize heffers. He views Tragicooper as having all the potency as one of his daft bullocks.

    The Staff:
    [Gaffer] Strict Natasha Raskin Sharp, Glasgow Southside enforcer
    [Red Team Expert] Ben Yeti Cooper, the Himalayan Halfwit
    [Blue Team Expert] Posh Kate Shrilly Trilly Bliss
    [Auctioneer] Farmer Will, the milkman, milking the profits
    [Auction Location] Stourbridge
    (Miserlin Rating: Unlisted)

    Start.jpeg Auction.jpeg

    The Teams:
    [Red Team] Mother & Daughter, School cook and volunteer, i.e. unemployable.
    (Challenge: Culinary connection)
    [Blue Team] Father & Daughter, Ken Bates is a leak p1ss1ng bronze medallist winner while Norma Bates is into upcycling, Norman! Norman! where are my milk churns.
    (Challenge: Communication)

    The Shopping:
    Reds: Green glass scent bottle (18) shoe-in says Farmer Will, Enamelled silver Scandi brooch (75) might struggle, 3 brass ladles, sounds like a bingo call (18 Challenge) topend.
    Blues: Very new post box (8 Challenge) Junk says FW but OK price, Spelter dog on a plinth (78) topend but relaxed, Empty carpenter's tool box (12) Bargain.

    The Distraction:
    Traditional Welsh music, pre-Tom Jones. Welsh triple harp time. The musical Rolls-Royce to the Scottish Bagpipe old banger and the Cheapskate Celtic harp. Welsh triple harps and Welsh triple crowns. Sweet music indeed.

    Distraction.jpeg

    The Auction:
    Reds: Green glass scent bottle (profit), Enamelled silver Scandi brooch (evens stevens), 3 brass ladles (small loss).
    Yeti's BB is a silver shoe pin cushion (90) cough splutter, REJECTED, 40-60, 75, another Cooper loss.

    ScentBottle.jpeg PinCushion.jpeg

    Blues: Very new post box (decent profit), Spelter dog on a plinth (nice profit) surely a GG, Empty carpenter's tool box (small profit), Golden Gavel by the skin of their teeth.
    Trilly's BB is A French Charmant glass perfume bottle (30), 20-30, 90. Excellent work Trills.

    Blues.jpg

    The Aftermath:
    Decent Auction with decent bids online and in the room which is what you want to see. A tale of 2 experts, Trilly Winny Sheer Bliss and the Useless Dunderheaded Yeti Cooper. Golden Gavel and a decent profit for Trilly's Blues. The Yeti's Reds only made an overall profit because they rejected his hopelessly overpriced BB.

    RedWin.jpeg BlueWin.jpeg

    The Hi-Kick:
    Outdoor wooded uneven grass kick. Blue bloke has a stick, so is excused. Everyone else hits par and only the Blue girl fires her bolt a little too early. Overall, Yes, YES!!

    HiKick2.jpeg
     
    OldTraff78 likes this.
  7. OldTraff78

    OldTraff78 Reservist

    :D "Abominable Showman"! Carlos does inspire great nicknames.
    "Strict Natasha, this time it's having a good twang on something between your legs"
    *woop woop snurgle snurgle*
    Very satisfying day.
     
  8. reg_varney

    reg_varney Squad Player

    Sneak preview for tomorrow, looks like it's going to be good one if this is anything to go by:

    upload_2022-11-7_20-30-35.png
     
  9. OldTraff78

    OldTraff78 Reservist

    hoohoohoo!

    Now thinking BH stars as 007 characters?!

    Could fill a page....
     
  10. OldTraff78

    OldTraff78 Reservist

    McWitch as Rosa Klebb? Kicking profits to death with her spikey shoes?
    Christina as Mrs Bond/Diana Rigg in OHMSS.
    Raj stroking a white cat, obvs.
    Gary Peeepeee as fellow Asian 'Dr No Profit'?
    Tubby Tommy, in his trimmed facial hair incarnation, could pass for Hugo Drax.
     
    Last edited: Nov 7, 2022
    wfcmoog likes this.
  11. OldTraff78

    OldTraff78 Reservist

    And Strict Natasha could've stunt-doubled for Ms Munro in Spy Who Loved Me?

    "A pair is always worth more"

    PortalsCoverlarge2186_1024x1024.jpg
     
    wfcmoog likes this.
  12. OldTraff78

    OldTraff78 Reservist

    16229585611_d09ea9c8f2_b.jpg _86647987_75753709.jpg
     
    wfcmoog likes this.
  13. reg_varney

    reg_varney Squad Player

    Muttley Serrell as Bodge Job.
    McWitch as the Pool of Piranha's.
    Cooper would be Spectre No.11, the one who reports no profits and is electrocuted in his chair at the beginning.
    Sarky as Scaramarky.
    Charl-eh in drag, Plenty O'Fool.
     
    Last edited: Nov 7, 2022
    wfcmoog and OldTraff78 like this.
  14. reg_varney

    reg_varney Squad Player

    Uncle Eric Nick Nack Knowles.
    Tee Hee Hanson
    (Corrected) McWitch as the Pool of Piranhas
    Hawley as the psychedelic credit sequence
    Marine Boy, naturally as Karl Stromberg
     
    Last edited: Nov 7, 2022
    OldTraff78 likes this.
  15. reg_varney

    reg_varney Squad Player

    Bargainised Bond Film Titles are even trickier.
     
  16. reg_varney

    reg_varney Squad Player

    Hawley can be P1ssy SuitPukey
     
  17. OldTraff78

    OldTraff78 Reservist

    :D
    Creative lateral thinking at its finest.
     
  18. reg_varney

    reg_varney Squad Player

    What a weak opening. Boooooooo.
     
  19. reg_varney

    reg_varney Squad Player

    Moog will be pleased. 2 connected challenges.
     
    wfcmoog likes this.
  20. reg_varney

    reg_varney Squad Player

    More sh1tty chairs.
     
  21. Harefield Yellow

    Harefield Yellow First Year Pro

    They're NOT seriously considering those FFS !
     
  22. reg_varney

    reg_varney Squad Player

    Roo loves it when the 2 lads get bossy.
     
  23. reg_varney

    reg_varney Squad Player

    Chairs thankfully rejected.
     
  24. reg_varney

    reg_varney Squad Player

    Excellent. Auntie Liz as auctioneer.
     
    wfcmoog likes this.
  25. OldTraff78

    OldTraff78 Reservist

    mmm. Roo Sandwich....

    Wow, hark at that ashtray! The Fly Who Loved Me.
     
  26. reg_varney

    reg_varney Squad Player

    Treepants, has he lost it with the Troika.
     
    wfcmoog likes this.
  27. OldTraff78

    OldTraff78 Reservist

    Foghorn, Auntie Liz, Cockinmouth Steph, Tash the Lash, Trilly, Princess Christina, Roo, and McWitch = Octopussies.
     
    reg_varney likes this.
  28. OldTraff78

    OldTraff78 Reservist

    Does proper 20th century Scandi design ever make a loss?
    That butterfly was great.
    So two flies smashed it today.
    Obviously, insects doing so well should appeal to Hornets.
     
    wfcmoog likes this.
  29. reg_varney

    reg_varney Squad Player

    Roo is tongue-tied before Nirvana is reached.

    TongueTied2.jpg NIrvana2.jpg
     
    OldTraff78 likes this.
  30. OldTraff78

    OldTraff78 Reservist

    Another BH hostess-in-ecstasy screengrab!
    Well spotted, Reg.
    Today's dearly departed Leslie Phillips would surely have approved.
    Ding dong.
     
    wfcmoog likes this.
  31. reg_varney

    reg_varney Squad Player

    BBC approved preamble:
    Sawbridgeworth 10
    Bargain Hunt Series 56
    https://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/m000jbtb
    Today’s teams are Bargain Hunting with experts Roo Irvine and Tim Weeks at Sawbridgeworth in Hertfordshire. Charlie Ross finds out about the fascinating world of espionage and uncovers some everyday objects that aren’t quite what they seem.

    The Translation:
    It's the posh t1t, his name is Bond, Vaga Bond, Codename F double 0 L, Licence to Fail. Trying to thwart him is supervillain TimGold FingerPants with love interest provided by the delightful Roo Plenty O'Pussy Goodhead Irvine to provide the necessary exoticism with plenty of Licence to Drool. You'll be captured and toyed with for days, if you're lucky. Auction is located in the skyscape of the volcanic mountains of Norfolk with Little Nellie Talbot, small and compact but still packs a punch. Underestimate her at your peril.

    The Staff:
    [Gaffer] Omnifool Charlie Ross
    [Red Team Expert] Delightful Roo Irvine, full of Eastern Promise
    [Blue Team Expert] Tim Treepole Tudor Weeks
    [Auctioneer] Elizabeth Talbot, sounds like and looks like a Jane Austen extra. Auntie Liz.
    [Auction Location] TW Gaze, Diss, Norfolk twinned with Datt in Germany
    (Miserlin Rating: Unlisted)

    Start.jpeg Auction.jpeg

    The Teams:
    [Red Team] Best mates from school, Pharmceutical Manager and Shoe Salesman.
    (Challenge: With hands)
    [Blue Team] Retired ukulele female buddies, so no rude George Formby numbers about Tom Peeping.
    (Challenge: With legs)

    The Shopping:
    Reds: Time-logging machine (140 Challenge) struggle, Pair of WWI trench art cases (35) Good, Silver Jockey cap vesta (45) might struggle.
    Blues: Italian brass fly ashtray (10 Challenge) Good, Norwegian silver and enamel butterfly brooch (80) Good, Norwegian silver and enamel leaf brooch (50) Good.

    The Distraction:
    Charl-eh talks about clandestine operations. The ColdT1t's shown a Monopoly board with a hidden map, a chess set with a compass, handkerchiefs with maps, miniature telescope in a matchstick. The bloke showing him the items threatens to kill him twice. Good job you Only Live Twice. He doesn't realise that the posh fool is a Japanese Banzaii robot created during the same caper. Does he want to see his giant Mothra? It's time to turn Japanese? Char-eh drops his trousers to reveal his secret compartments. His head spins like a compass and a substance akin to Miso soup appears on the floor. The bloke threatens to kill him again. Place your bets now Mr Shake Hands Man.

    Distraction.jpeg

    The Auction:
    Reds: Time-logging machine (big loss), Pair of WWI trench art cases (small profit), Silver Jockey cap vesta (small profit).
    Roo's BB is a 1927 Birmingham silver dish (30), 30-40, 50, nice profit on a nice item.

    TimeLogger.jpeg SilverDish.jpeg

    Blues: Italian brass fly ashtray (nice profit), Norwegian silver and enamel butterfly brooch (profit) GG incoming, Norwegian silver and enamel leaf brooch (decent profit). Golden Gavel.
    Treepants BB is Troika pottery bowl (150), REJECTED, 40-50, 80. Big loss. What were you thinking Weeks!

    Blues.jpg

    The Aftermath:
    A real mixed bag for both the experts today. An opening scene electrocution for failure is certainly on the cards. A Roo Boo-Boo with that clocking-in machine. Auntie Liz thought they'd really overpaid and they certainly did. The Jockey cap was not as old as was expected and only got a profit by a nose. A trip to an Alpine Health clinic to be Blofeld's plaything followed by a quick sale to some middle Eastern slavers awaits you, Roo. She says she loves it when the 2 lads get bossy. I didn't realise a Spit Rotisserie was on the list of items up for bidding. Blues had 3 great items that got them a Golden Gavel then Treepants has a massive brainfart moment with that piece of massively overpriced regular Troika. It was no-brainer to reject it. The Piranha fish pool awaits you Weeks.

    RedLoss.jpeg BlueWin.jpeg

    The Hi-Kick:
    Standard indoor Kick. Everyone is decent. Excellent red-booted skirt flare high growler kick from Roo leaves little to the imagination. Yes, Hell YES!!

    HiKick1.jpeg
    HiKick2.jpeg
     
    wfcmoog and OldTraff78 like this.
  32. reg_varney

    reg_varney Squad Player

    Ding dong! You're not wrong.
     
  33. OldTraff78

    OldTraff78 Reservist

    blimus! i think we can almost see Roo's moonraker there.

    Note the shifty young Red copping a thigh-ful eyeful. Disgraceful.

    lucky sod
     
    reg_varney likes this.
  34. reg_varney

    reg_varney Squad Player

    Brilliant pre-amble for tomorrow's episode. It really wet's the appetite. Well done the BBC.

    upload_2022-11-8_14-43-43.png
     
    Diamond likes this.
  35. reg_varney

    reg_varney Squad Player

    For Our Eyes Only. Certainly, a View for a Thrill. Where's Grace Jones' May Day to dampen one's ardour.
     
    OldTraff78 likes this.

Share This Page