Amusing names

A couple of amusing names that I've come across at work over the last week or two.

A client, I kid you not was called John Thomas. Parents need shooting for that one.
And ref Troy Deeney's Arsenal comments we've just had to send an application form off to a Cole Holeness.

I'm certainly familiar with call centres who allow staff to use aliases just in case there's threats or repercussions from the public but these two are genuine.

 

Caroline Hunt used to play doubles with Angie Mycock.
Ridiculous!

 

I really, truly want to know if there is a Mike Hunt out there somewhere.

 

I know a Mr and Mrs Bunney who named their daughter Esther.

 

There is - I believe he's one of the York Hunts...

 

Had a girl in my class last year who was named La-‘a. She was indignant when I pronounced her name “La-ah”. Apparently I was quite foolish for not realizing that you pronounce the dash. La-dash-a.

Then I had twins, Mister Doc and Doc Mister.

I also had a young lady named Female, pronounced “fem-ah-lay” after her parents unknowingly wrote female in the name section on her paperwork,thinking it was the box for gender due to their lack of English.

 

Ex colleague of mine with surname Kirton, called his daughter Annette.

Had it been a boy, he would have been called Paul.

Prat.

 

Whilst it’s obvious and someone will think it’s a wind-up, one of my best friends from school is genuinely named Wayne King. I also went to school with a girl called Ting-Ting and have a colleague called Gary Fishcheese.

 

I worked with a bloke in Norway called Bernt Aas. He worked for a while in the city of London where he would tell everyone his name was Bert Haas

 

I know someone who called their kid "Thorin" after Thorin Oakenshield in the Hobbit.

I pity the poor kid...

 

The head groundsman at Lords is Mick Hunt. So so close.

 

Are you sure this is not apocryphal? A mate told me exactly the same.

I once taught a Chinese student called Kerr Wang. Bear in mind that the names should be reversed (this is genuinely true).

 

To be fair, I never met his daughter or saw any birth certificates, but his name was Kirton and that is what he told us - seemed to be quite proud of it.

 

Don't know if this is genuine, or made up just for an amusing meme. I hope it's real:

 

I was in a shop once when they announced over the tannoy for Hugh Jardon to phone home urgently.

 

There was/is a Bedfordshire mental health worker called 'Dee Press'. Another unfortunately surnamed person I did once meet is the Central Beds Relay Support Officer named at the bottom of p.7 of the attached. I believe it is of Central American origin. A colleague nervously introduced her by her first name only...

www.centralbedfordshire.gov.uk/Images/pshe-newsletter_tcm3-14125.pdf

 

Years ago I had a job where I had to dial out to customers and connect them on a conference call. The Yank leader of the call asked me if I'd 'got Randy yet'. Slightly concerned I asked what he meant. He then said I had to call Randy Handcock. Genuinely the guy answered the phone using that name.

 

In the same company we had an online employee directory. There was a chap called Robert Sherunkle. I think IT were having a laugh with that one.

 

Found a bloke called Bert Justice on the telephone directory at work and used to work with Mark Hunt, who really was.

Any double barrel first name is very stupid.

 

A good pal of mine claims to have a work colleague named Russell Sprout. I don’t actually believe him, but it really makes me laugh.

 

There is indeed, I used to work with him. He was an educational psychologist, so was known as Doctor... He always insisted in being called Michael, absolutely hated being called Mike for some reason!

I have a;ways found people who have the same name twice weird, Neville Neville for example, father of Gary and Phil. I trained a bloke called Matthew Matthews once.

 

Known a few people with funny names. French Taxi driver called Reno Clio, Irish lad with a thick accent called Terry O'Type and a dustman called Paypa Shredder.

 

My wife once never saw a gynaecologist called Dr. Jenny Talia.

Ex England rugby union player Mike Catt has a wife named Ali.
Their children Tabby, Kitty, Manx and Pussy are all currently in therapy.

I've also not worked with some people who had funny names, examples being Colin-Nic Irrigation. Emma Nem and Didier Seethat.

 

I did used to know an old couple called Fanny and D1ck.

I also did some work for a US firm called EDS. At the time their CEO was called **** Brown. It used to make me smile when he sent me emails and they were headed Brown, D1ck.

 

I came across some absolute gems whilst teaching English in China.

Robot, Zippy, Beck, Boygaga, Overpig, Black baby, Tomato, Rain.. I'm sure I can think of more!

 

To be fair in Spanish the 'u' sound is pronounced like an English 'oo', but it does look funny on paper.

 

I worked as a tutor in Northern Territory for a while - and once agreed to take on three generations of a family named Stanley. The grandad (who was actually only in his late 30's) was Stanley Stanley Snr, his son was Stanley Stanley and his grandson Stanley Stanley Jnr.

Even stranger, and perhaps under pressure to give themselves anglicised names to make life easier for government authorities, many Aboriginal family names appear to have simply been taken from their surroundings - hence surnames such as Mailman, Daylight, Bluetongue and, the most unusual one I've come across, Dustbinlid.

 

Funny this thread has just popped up. This evening I sent an email to an Idiyat. Awesome.

 

Not so strange really. Many British surnames came about from their profession. Taylor, Smith, Cooper, Wright being obvious examples

btw I believe very few of the names put forward!

 

There were the two boys at school Ben Doon and Phil McCafferty. They were good friends always together.

 

If you're talking about the above names, I can assure you they are all kosher. The Mailman family abound in Northern Territory & Western Queensland, there was a boxing family of note in Queensland called the Daylights, but the others are less common.

Granted the Mailmans may have been named after a profession but the others? If the Jimmy Dustbinlid I knew had been named after a profession, he would have been called Jimmy Garbo...

 

Not always together - Ben left him and took up with Phil McCracken.

 

Another boywith an interesting name joined our class I think he was from Egypt - very unfit avoided PE always going behind the bicycle sheds.
Mustapha Fagg.
How we laughed.

 

Totally agree, the Chinese do choose some brilliant anglo names. In my team there (as well as a Rain like you) I had a Planning Manager who named herself Aloe. Sadly, and I should be far more professional and mature than this, I always said "Hello Aloe" in an awful french accent when I met her. Never ceased to amuse me and bemuse her. My apologies Aloe if you ever stumble across this.

And genuinely my sister-in-law married my brother to become Jenny Taylor, I went out with a lass from Ricky called Lou Pipe and one of my mum's friends is called Poppy Pen.

PS - My Dad's favourite 'old dad' joke told many many times over the years was "What do you call a Scottish Cloakroom Attendant? Angus MacCoatup". I honour his memory by inflicting this joke on all small children in the family almost as regularly as he did.