Things you hate III

The director of the hawkers of magic mentioned in my post above has "degrees", a "bachelor's degree" and a "bachelor's degree (Honours)", in "counselling psychology" from this esteemed (and not in the least bit dodgy sounding) place of learning.

There seems to be a dearth of these in St Albans. I'm assuming shop rents (and business rates) are astronomical in Snorbens (I know they are on B'wood's Shenley Rd because of the "heavy footfall") how on earth do they make any money selling three items a day? I'm certain their just tax write-offs.

 

Any money those juice women are making is from recruiting other zombies underneath them in the pyramid. It's not from selling juice.

 

Herbalife is another one. Woman at work spent a fortune on their stuff and went nuts when someone said it was a pyramid scheme.

And she certainly isn't getting any thinner.

 

There's one called "it works" Which is a plastic film women wrap around their body to get thin

It helps them lose water for very short term results and is basically cling film, but adherents are more prickly than members of the church of scientology if you are at all sceptical about the wondrous properties of their 30000% marked up Stretch N Seal

 

Any link to any videos on that site for purely research purposes for a friend?

 

My friend didn't see any women wrapped in plastic?

 

you need the more "specialist" sites for that sort of material.

 

*fixed*

 

Sorry Sir, I don't have that sort of filth in stock:

[whisper]meet me in the alley out the back in 2 minutes, bring cash[/whisper]

 

Spoiler: Discretion advised

 

In that video thumbnail, it looks like her ass is on back-to-front

 

That belongs on the Darknet.

 

People who make a big deal of their birthday every year even though it’s not an important one. I’ve got a few friends like it, they start a wassap group “let me know ASAP” and “ I need to know numbers guys” you get this for weeks in advance with most people ignoring it.

Please understand nobody else gives a **** about your 34th birthday.

 

Amen to that brother.
I have a contra agreement with family and friends. No cards and no presents. My nieces and nephew are an exception and they get a card, usually within a week of their birthday and I transfer £15 to my siblings bank account so they can deal with the present admin.
The friends birthday saga is usually brought about by their wives or gfs who feel it's their duty to assemble all local friends so their partner knows he's valued. I ignore.

 

For a lot of people, wrapping themselves in cling film is a lot easier than avoiding chips and getting up off their fat a*rses.

 

It's called "It Works"

They couldn't call it that if it were just a pyramid scheme, preying on the desperate and self loathing with snake oil.

And you call yourself a doctor?

 

The "gentleman's afternoon stroll in the park" school of defending, where the hands are clasped tightly behind the back whilst facing the opposing attacker running with the ball at his feet. There's been a sudden rash of this in the last year or so and I can't fathom it. Who told them to do it? Why? Why has it not been questioned?

Apart from looking like the pose Prince Charles adopts when meeting factory workers, to my mind it slashes the effectiveness of the defender. He can't use his arms to balance or help jump or twist and turn. All he can do is hop up and down on the spot ineffectually like a crappy River Dancer in football boots.

The risk of giving away a handball penalty is minimal (it'd take a harsh ref to give hands against a defender so close in) and is far outweighed by the detriment to the team of more or less immobilising yourself and going into the tackle like you've been arrested and handcuffed.

I saw a world cup game this week (Nigeria I think) where the defender still had his hands clasped behind his back even when his keeper was picking the ball out of the back of the net.

 

She probably had the wrong one - the special one for "treating" "autism"*.

*Actually another parent was banned at the same time for linking my "witchcraft" post to an agent (another parent) of this guff.

 

Can't help thinking wrapping the cling film around her air passages wouldn't be more effective.

 

Ahhhhh yes. What's described in the trade as the "homeopathic application of oxygen". It truly is a miracle cure as the patient never, ever exhibits symptoms again.

 

Wonder cure, from hiccups to herpes.

 

50 litres is only 50 kg. Just saying. Maybe her neighbour has a swimming pool.

 

How this place still exists in the 21st century Britain is beyond me, the fact that it gets a penny of the NHS "budget" angers me.

 

I saw that but she said in ounces, so I guess that if she weighs 200lbs she needs to drink 100oz of water, which is about 2.8 litres, which is not an absurd amount.

 

Likewise those who want to make a big deal of my birthday, particularly when it's not a big one. I don't really care about them any more!

 

People who don't want to know the score so they can watch the game later. They get quite aggressive if you mention in front of them what is happening.

If it's that important, GO and watch the game

 

People who give away the score when you want to watch the match later, at a time more convenient to you.

 

Someone watching the same game on TV as me but in a different room who continues to shout out a one way conversation.

And then keeps shouting at the commentators to shut up.

 

Similarly people who just shout out meaningless lines that they heard from commentators in order to make it look as if they understand football.

 

Public toilets. On the rare occasions I'm left with no choice other than to use them, my visits always seem to coincide with Satan having just taken a dump.

I'm reliably informed he/she/it also regularly pops in to the ladies to unleash hell.