Things That Confuse You..

Discussion in 'Taylor's Tittle-Tattle - General Banter' started by hornmeister, Aug 27, 2020.

  1. Filbert

    Filbert Leicester supporting bloke

    I went into a diner and asked for a chip cob, a half of bitter and a bag of scratchings and they looked at me gone out!
  2. K9 Hornet

    K9 Hornet Border Collie Dog

    Perhaps one of your foreign friends can spell apostrophe for you, and replace what for how :)
  3. K9 Hornet

    K9 Hornet Border Collie Dog

    The American pronunciation of "water" is "Budweiser" I believe
    Since63 and Happy bunny like this.
  4. Knight GT

    Knight GT Predictor extraordinaire 2013/14

    El distraído likes this.
  5. Filbert

    Filbert Leicester supporting bloke

    Things that confuse me;

    People glory supporting Spurs.


    My 25kg mongrel dog being terrified of Westies and cardboard tubes.

    Half a pint.

    Low fat cheese.

    Filming yourself at a football game.

    Vlogging and YouTubers in general.

    Spending hundreds of pounds on adding bits of tat to the outside of a 10 year old Seat Ibiza.

    How come when I hoover the carpet in our bedroom it looks no different but when my partner does it it looks like a plush, fine wool rug.

    We don’t get any spiders in our house except for those spindly, leggy ****s. Go two days without dusting or hoovering and every corner of the house has one in a pathetic little web.

    Why my car aggressively beeps at me when the temperature drops below 4 degrees. It’s the same noise as the parking sensors and the automatic break warning when the car in front slams it’s brakes on. It’s distressing.

    The Falklands.

    Arguing about politics on the internet.

    When I kick a football with my left foot I get a proper nice bend on it. It whips like a David Beckham cross. Where it goes is anyone’s guess but I’ve scored some beauties with my left. I’m right footed and I can’t get anywhere near that kind of bend with my stronger foot.

    Think that’s it.
    Last edited: Aug 27, 2020
  6. El distraído

    El distraído Johnny Foreigner

    Whoops! I'm not even going to try arguing that or defending myself.
  7. K9 Hornet

    K9 Hornet Border Collie Dog

    Sorry about posting that, no-one likes a smart-arse...
  8. Keighley

    Keighley Squad Player

    I do try to help with this one where I can. ;)
    El distraído and Knight GT like this.
  9. Bwood_Horn

    Bwood_Horn Squad Player

    Sort of OK likes this.
  10. Bwood_Horn

    Bwood_Horn Squad Player

    Our American workmates (Texas, Tennessee and Minnesota) used to be amazed that "Scouse" Pete (Tuebrook), "Ozzie" Mark (Darwin) and myself "...all talked in the same accent...". TBF Mark refused to believe that Stryne was based on cockney until he met my 'born within earshot of the Bow bells' mum when she visited Vilnius...
  11. Sort of OK

    Sort of OK Reservist

    nascot likes this.
  12. luke_golden

    luke_golden Space Cadet

    You’ve never known fear, until you’ve faced getting a haircut in the US. 30 minutes stuck in a chair, surrounded by people who enjoy talking to strangers for a living. Just awful. 10 years I’ve been here and I still dread it.
    Filbert likes this.
  13. Filbert

    Filbert Leicester supporting bloke

    The closest thing I can think of here would be getting a haircut in Yorkshire.
    Horace_goes_up_north likes this.
  14. luke_golden

    luke_golden Space Cadet

    Never been that far North for long enough to warrant a trim, so I’ll take your word on it.
  15. Davy Crockett

    Davy Crockett First Year Pro

    Getting out LBW despite everything I do . Taking a leg guard and my trigger movement
    is to go back . The finger goes up . Taking a middle and off guard then shuffling outside
    the line . Same problem. Finger goes up .

    Having a weight problem despite being 90% vegetarian and still active sport wise
    despite my years . I play cricket in the summer , jog twice a week and give the heavy
    punch bag, in the garage, a good seeing to twice a day M-F.

    Today's moosic . Not a clue what is in the top 10 .

    Luton fans who are ok . They are out there.

    Gary Linekar.
  16. Diamond

    Diamond Squad Player

    5th generation English born people whos long distant relatives once lived in Italy calling their kids Marco, Luca and Rosa, driving a cr*p Italian car and supporting Inter Milan.
  17. Davy Crockett

    Davy Crockett First Year Pro

    That is a good one that my "do as you please" mentality is comprised!
  18. The Recluse

    The Recluse Reservist

    Haiku poems.
    I mean really, they are so
    self limiting aren't they.
  19. Welcome to my world. In fact doing anything in Yorkshire for that matter.
    Filbert likes this.
  20. Filbert

    Filbert Leicester supporting bloke

    Presumably when someone from Yorkshire meets a Welsh person they just get stuck in an endless feedback loop of telling each other where they’re from and how proud they are to be from there.
  21. WillisWasTheWorst

    WillisWasTheWorst Its making less grammar mistake's thats important

    Is there even a Top 10 any more?
  22. El distraído

    El distraído Johnny Foreigner

  23. Filbert

    Filbert Leicester supporting bloke

    Oi oi what’s the old trouble and strife done now?

    Can’t live with ‘em.... can’t live with ‘em! Am I right?!
    El distraído likes this.
  24. a19tgg

    a19tgg Squad Player

    I never take a bath, I only ever shower, yet somehow the bath always needs cleaning.
    K9 Hornet likes this.
  25. K9 Hornet

    K9 Hornet Border Collie Dog

    <nerd>technically one syllable short in the first line I think</nerd>
  26. I Blame Bassett

    I Blame Bassett Squad Player

    Head teachers who are supposedly in charge of a top 20 school who write 'see you tomorrow' when the agreed start date was a week tomorrow.
    Lord help the children!
  27. Hornpete

    Hornpete Squad Player

    The garish yellow tinge of wfcforums when it's not logged you in and remembered your settings.
    UEA_Hornet likes this.
  28. Roger Irrelevant

    Roger Irrelevant Reservist

    When considering how big the universe is people identifying themselves as being from a particular country.
    It really is pointless.
  29. K9 Hornet

    K9 Hornet Border Collie Dog

    Why Jordan Pickford is an international goalkeeper
    Carpster likes this.
  30. El distraído

    El distraído Johnny Foreigner

    Wayne Lineker.

    Does he not understand how much of a creep people thing he is? He's pretty disgusting to be honest.
    wfcSinatra likes this.
  31. WillisWasTheWorst

    WillisWasTheWorst Its making less grammar mistake's thats important

    I've literally never heard of him. Probably for the best.
  32. K9 Hornet

    K9 Hornet Border Collie Dog

    Me neither. I assume he's related to the jug-eared crisp salesman?
  33. HappyHornet24

    HappyHornet24 Crapster Staff Member

    I don’t have any strong feelings about the disposal of Barker, Le Tissier et al. However, I am confused about how Lineker continually retains his place on the throne of BBC football coverage, at vast expense. Can’t stand the jug-eared twerp.
    K9 Hornet likes this.
  34. Happy bunny

    Happy bunny Cheered up a bit

    I do. Nothing wrong with self-love.
    K9 Hornet likes this.
  35. The Voice of Reason

    The Voice of Reason First Team Captain

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