Me and the missus and the nippers was alarmed and distressed to hear on the morning news that our dear Prince Phillip has been involved in a motor prang. No doubt the fault of the two little girls in the Mini Metro with the baby in the back, who were speeding along a road, which although technically legal, really shouldn't be that speed limit. The council, by a pure coincidence, just happens to be holding an emergency meeting to reduce the speed, so that proves it. They should never have been allowed to drive along there like that. But thank gord that the very exhaustive news reports live from outside the palace have confirmed that the cheeky old treasure is in rude health and, as always, cracking his wonderful and celebrated racist funnies. He knows how to call a spade a spade! Ha ha ha. Of course the po-faced politically correct thought-police complain, but he's only saying what we're all thinking isn't he? Ha ha. What was it? Slitty eyed indians chucking spears at each other! Ha ha ha. He's an immigrant himself, which is what makes it funny. We Kremlins were also very heartened to hear that British justice, blind to class and prejudice of any sort, prevailed as always and both drivers were breathalysed. We are sure that is the case. Just as reported. Prince no prince. Breath into the bag please sir. Oh yes, it all seems very credible to us. In my role as a domestic assistant (probationary), I come across a few people who are around 97 years old and they can barely get into a car, let alone drive one. So I was further cheered to know that the wonderful Prince is in such a marvellous state of body and mind that he's still in perfect condition to career around the public highway in charge of a monster truck. Gord Bless Yer Sir! Long may you run over us!
Here's your chance to own a little bit of history @Clive_ofthe_Kremlin : https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-norfolk-46944912
I feel for this poor commoner and hope she gets the apology, invite to garden party, damehood and freedom of Kings Lynn that she desperately craves And to think once upon a time her head would be on a stake at the Tower for faking a sprained wrist and calling a royal a disgrace
If you need any road safety features added locally just invite Phil over for a drive and hey presto they magically get rushed through.
She's certainly milking her little bit of fame isn't she! Demanding a letter from him to apologise. Going on This Morning saying how hard this has been for her (she only bloody broke her arm). Getting a letter and sharing it with The Mirror newspaper.
I wasn't aware Prince Phillip knew what an apology was. Not known for his humility and delicate turn of phrase. Or, it seems,his driving!
