Panic Buying

I blame people like this, though probably good for pedestrian impacts.

 

Is that a Rolls?

I’ll get me coat.

 

@StuBoy is in big trouble

 

As it happens I found a pack of 4 Andrex left in our local shop today. Brought them immediately. It’s not the coronavirus I’m worried about right now.

 

Out of stock in Harrow Tesco:
Pasta
Hand wash
Wet wipes
Paracetamol
Big roll
Frozen vegetables (all)

Didn't check tinned stuff.

 

Losing one’s mind over this is now a worldwide sport. Warning, it’s not pleasant.

Coronavirus: Brawl over toilet paper in Sydney supermarket. http://news.sky.com/story/coronavirus-brawl-over-toilet-paper-in-sydney-supermarket-11951619

 

Any wingers left on the shelves?

 

Tesco all out of Pussetto pasta sauce.

Morrisons has some troylet roll but its not in best condition.

Lidl have a special guide to the championship available still on offer.

 

Anyway. Panic buying... Everyone buys loo roll, but if everyone buys it in one week theres not enough on the shelf. Cant see that many people actually went out and bought wholsale amounts.

 

If you run out of toilet paper just waddle across the bathroom and wash your terd cutter in the shower. I do this at least once a month.

 

Doing the weekly online shop, not a bog roll or paracetamol in stock. Simply want one packet of each.

Hoarders, don’t stop there. Stock up on contraceptives and prevent yourselves from breeding too.

 

“Online shop”? What happened to your socialist credentials, man? Get yourself down to the corner shop for a packet of Capstan Full Strength and a copy of the Sporting Life right now!

 

I would, but the whippet is poorly.

 

Fever ? Dry bark ?

 

This

https://imgur.com/a/47qboOk

 

I saw my stepmother yesterday who, for some context, is a complete moron. She excitedly asked me if I’d done any panic buying yet and giddily reeled off the list of things she’d usually have no interest in buying or eating but bought anyway. It’s like Christmas and a snowy day rolled into one for the ‘u ok hun’ generation.

 

It's all a marketing ploy from Andrex and it's worked perfectly. I bought shares in their company a couple of weeks ago. Shrewd move indeed.

 

Shamelessly stolen from twitter:

Supermarkets introduce rationing to stop panic buying:

Tesco: 12 toilet rolls, 2 hand sanitisers, 2kg pasta.
Sainsbury:
16 toilet rolls, 2 hand sanitisers, 2kg pasta/ rice.
Waitrose: 12 toilet rolls, 1 sanitiser, 1kg polenta.
Lidl: 1 socket set, 2 pink sports bras, 1 mig welder.

 

You daft racist!

 

I do this with a heavy heart, but I can report the tesco by bank station is sold out of tinned sardines.

 

If you don't wash your hands between wiping your arse and touching your face in normal circumstances, perhaps you should at least start doing so for the duration of this pandemic.

 

I knew that.

Did you also know that Frisbee was originally the name of a pie company, whose tins could be thrown. When the toy was invented people automatically took the name of the flying pie dish and assigned it to the new toy.

 

You think that’s as interesting as Fray Bentos?

We’re in a national crisis here moog! Get real!!

 

That’s also what I’m herring.

 

Funny that! Ever since I installed those cameras in your home for your 'security' I've found that I've been having to wash my hands 6 or 7 times a day.

 

Lidl doing inflatable caskets on a buy one get one free deal, but they have run out of foot pumps.

 

Inflatable? What’s that for, burial at sea?

 

Yep me too - completely sold trout.

 

This is what happens when we remove natural selection.

 

This Country FFS.

Connect the terms ‘hazmat suit’, ‘toilet paper’ and ‘West Country’.

https://www.somersetlive.co.uk/news/somerset-news/coronavirus-covid-19-toilet-rolls-3945503

 

This IS natural selection. You weren't quick enough, smart enough and selfish enough to buy up the toilet rolls and alcohol gel, you die.

 

Bath is too posh to be proper West Country, m8.