Newcastle United FC 1-0 Watford FC - 03/11/2018

In fairness it's on the curriculum of most private schools,along with lacrosse,top hats and tiffin.

 

??

 

Erm that was El Señor Endean - not me!

Writing the preview I mean, not doing a holding the ears goal celebration.

 

Wary about this one.

Less because of actual facts (because on paper we should actually tonk them), but more because the pessimist in me thinks surely we can't keep winning and playing beautiful football.

1-3 Watford.

 

What “Allo Allo” reference?

 

I think Watford are the most underrated team in the league, alongside Bournemouth; both very good. They're fast on the counter-attack, they're big and strong. Newcastle have to come out and try to beat somebody at some point, but I'm going 2-0 Watford.

PAUL PREDICTS: 0-2 (12/1 with Sky Bet)

 

The bit where Joselu says 'Good Moaning'.

 

I think the picture of Benitez with his wife Edith, was that which was being referred to by my learned colleague.

 

Tough day for the Orns

2-0

Hughes and Capoue

 

Javi confirms no new injuries for Saturday. Oh and a chap called Nathaniel Chalobah is fit again and has his eye on the Chalobah role.

 

Can we slot him in by playing three at the back?

 

I'm afraid the lacrosse is only for the girls at school; misandry at its finest.

 

Actual footage from last season (Deeney got hungry mid-game):

 

Lawro going 2-0.

To the Toon!

Some lame looking rock band are going for us.

Fingers crossed for the lamoids.

 

Depends where you live - lacrosse is a popular and viscious male sport in cheshire / NW

 

Come on watford

 

“The Magpies managed 27 shots without scoring in their defeat by Brighton in their last home game and, if they keep creating that many chances, a couple of them are going to go in.”

Whilst none of ours do? Erm, ok. You watch this come true now.

 

Newcastle always have a defender you haven’t actually heard of.

A Pettigrew or a random Garcia or similar.

That’s who Troy is about to hump.

 

Lawro & numbers/logic continue along their parallel paths.

 

Surely that IS a picture of Benitez with his wife Edith?

 

Yeah, but not so much in the schools, mostly in the disproportionately large number of club teams that exist in the greater Manchester area. Only one member of my team played at school, but a great deal were Mancs from Timperley, Brooklands, Poynton etc.

My school was top 5 in the country for the girl's game, yet there was no male participation option at all.

 

And that’s Numberwang

 

Indeed...a bloke I knew at Uni had played lacrosse at school and enjoyed regaling us in the joys of such manoeuvres as the "face-stop" & suchlike...

 

Love the reference. Now got the picture of Lawrenson randomly calling out numbers for teams.

 

Mr IBB got a 'Half Blue' at Cambridge for lacrosse.It wasn't considered worthy of a full one.
He played it at school and it wasn't a private school though,a grammar in Croydon,sadly now a housing development.
He is more confident we will win than I am.
They can't be as bad as their fans suggest can they?

 

Interesting...when was he there? Many sports were only Half Blue to be honest.
Furthest I got was Hockey 2nd XI squad...couldn't afford to pay to go on the various pre-term tours, which was expected of "good chaps" back then. Also the fact I looked like a Viking with ear-rings didn't help, I suppose!

 

"Spam,spam,spam,spam,spam,spam,spam,spam.
Lovely spam wonderful spam!"
Oh late '60s it would have been.
He is still peeved that he didn't get one for football.
He was in the team but damaged his knee and was still injured when the match occurred.
Do you still look like a Viking?
I do hope so!

 

Hopefully they will just conclude that there is no point in shooting.

 

Time & gravity have done their worst on that front...it was 40+ years ago!

 

Talksport covering the games this morning. Had John Barnes on.

Brazil: "so this is a big 6 pointer"!!! Say what?! He did retract that later saying he meant for Newcastle, not us. But then that's surely a big 3 pointer for them?!

Anyhow. Barnes: "Watford change their managers and all their players every year".

Come on Barnesy, you're better than that.

 

The trouble is, he's really not.

Great player, awful manager, worse pundit.

 

To the bitter dark Norf now, off we go to the Toon,
If they get even a shot away, they’ll be over the moon.
They’re playing like cloggers, their fans are aghast,
Led by the noble Lord Ashley, how long can it last?

Only question, can our stars survive, the bleak artic cold?
Their thugs ‘gainst our angels - can win the skilled and the bold?
We’re used to sweet Hertfordshire, pleasant and mild,
Will our tikka-takka be disrupted by the harsh Newcastle wild?

Their people emotional; they change opinions irrationally,
“I love Rafa Benitez, I only hate that *** Ashley,”
One game later - “I want that fat Spanish waiter to go,
“We’re a massive club - we hold fifty-five thousand, you know?”

“Oh what interesting beasts”, once reviewed Sir David Attenborough,
“I never thought I’d find a place more obscene than Middlesbrough.
Geordie women are orange, they address them as “Lasses”
They’re the ones wearing nothing but foot long eyelashes.

With the IQ of the least unintelligible bimbo.
The males, topless skinheads, their titties akimbo.
“I don’t get it, we’re a huge club”, they yell out in pain,
As little Watford, from the warm south, score against them, again and again.

 

Hardly seen or heard him say a good word about Watford in recent times. Definitely went down in my estimation over the years.

Ever since he started getting bigger boned.

 

Great player, but clearly not much cop at "punditry"....or management, come to that.
Posted before I realised Clive had said the same...

 

you're haiku's are **** m8