It’s off to the roundabout-heavy city of concrete cows and grim, windswept underpasses filled with abandoned shopping trollies and fluttering litter for tonight’s game against nomadic, wandering Tottenton Keyspurs. The sinking Miltonspuds have crashed to three defeats in their last four, managing not one single clean sheet. Their only win in recent times coming from a very questionable penalty awarded against the feeble Brighton & Hove Sandflies. Those three defeats have of course included the comfortable whupping we handed them at the Vic, with goals from Troy ‘Twiggy’ Deeney and Craggy Craig Cathcart. The Tattenhoe Stratfords are built around a single player – the fluff-bearded gentle warm fart of the world cup and Arsenal academy product, Harold Kane. However with him likely to sit out the game due to ‘tiredness’ after his valiant exertions tapping in two yard sitters against world cup minnows three or four months ago, they’re likely to rely on the likes of soldier boy Son “not well” Heung-min and the lamentable Erik Lamela, plus an assortment of other half-baked lilywhite lily livers. Ought to be easy meat, even for our reserves. Prediction 1-4 (Success, Quina, Wilmott, Quina).