Leaked Transfer Committee Meeting Conversation

So a friend of a friend of a friend has just told me of a very awkward conversation that happened near the end of the transfer window. I know people will want to know my source, but obviously I don't want to actually name them, but some of you know people there, so I'll give you the initials I was given of RG.

Pozzo and Duxbury called Giraldi for the chat and he was the last to enter the room. Giraldi started in a jovial mood but that quickly changed and here is how it went.....

Giraldi - (to the source) "They're waiting for me" (then to Pozzo and Duxbury) "Break it up, put him down. No they wouldn't, he wouldn't (pointing to Pozzo) his dads loaded"

Pozzo - "he does ok"

Giraldi - "what a day"

Duxbury - "Filippo, do you have that list of targets to improve our defence?"

Giraldi - "Glad you brought that up"

Duxbury - "That's why I'm here"

Giraldi - "I've been formulating a lot of good ideas"

Duxbury - "I want the list of targets we spoke about 4 months ago, using the expensive and thorough scouting network we have, that is going to help keep us in the Premier League. You know how important this list is to the club. I discover that this (holding a piece of paper) is the fruits of your labour"

Giraldi - "Don't go through my stuff"

Duxbury - "Read the first sentence to Gino"

Giraldi - "Imagine a cross between a documentary of transfers between just 2 clubs and one about a man who rises from nowhere to be the future face of football. You've just imagined 'off pitch, on pitch' devised by and starring Filippo Giraldi"

Duxbury - "Filippo, I don't understand this"

Giraldi - "well we sign players from Udinese and then sell some back, all the time I show up on the pitch giving out high fives when we win and...."

Duxbury - "Not the documentary! I don't understand why you haven't got any defenders ready to come in, or your failure to do so over multiple transfer windows now"

Giraldi - "You're viewing my methods like there's something missing, you're looking at the puzzle through the keyhole, when you should be...."

Duxbury - "Some signings would be useful"

Giraldi - "Contract extensions are better than signings"

Duxbury - "you're on a warning, three strikes and...."

At this point Pozzo whispered in Duxbury's ear something about a nude photo and the conversation ended.

It's 3rd person news so I'm not 100% this actually happened, but sounds possible?

 

I prefer the stuff you do about his little hand

 

U wot m8?

 

Nurse!

 

WTF was that supposed to be, it makes less sense than the fact our recruitment policy is ****ed.

If the guy can't even string a comprehensible sentence together, how the **** is he supposed to mastermind our scouting network, he needs to go NOW!!!

 

I've always thought Giraldi is somehow linked/connected to the Pozzo family in some sphere outside of football. He's untouchable & will be here while Pozzo still is.

There is no other explanation.

 

Is this supposed to be comedy?

 

I believe it won 24 awards including a Golden Globe and several BAFTA's, so I'd say it was rated fairly high in terms of comedy.

 

Yeah, but Mrs Brown’s Boys was voted best comedy at the National Television Awards, too...

 

Good point. I have never been able to understand the appeal of that show at all, tried a couple of times.

 

I believe Mr Bean won awards and I've never seen anything less funny in my life

 

Ohh OK.

 

Bean wasn't great but it has been scientifically proven that there has never been anything less funny than Mrs Brown's Boys. Absolutely nothing. Not even Michael McIntyre.

 

Not even our comedy defending in the dying minutes of Saturday's first half?

 

Agreed. This should never have been released.

From what I hear, Giraldi’s PA Julie Anderton has been sacked.

 

I heard that was as a result of an entirely unrelated matter involving a photocopier.

 

I just text my source about this, he said he's never heard of her. But I sensed that was just loyalty, once someone leaves the club, they no longer exist.

 

Blackadder was brilliant and Atkinson was excellent. Mr Bean was just awful. There is nothing I would rather watch less

 

Blackadder goes forth was very good IMO. Seen that series many times, still makes me chuckle.

 

Agreed. Blackadder was absolutely brilliant. Great comedy writing.

Much the same as Upstart Crow now (also I believe written by Ben Elton).

 

I was going to say 'Ebola' but then I thought about it and yup, Mrs Brown's Boys is less funny than that too.

 

Never heard of this, where can one watch it?

 

Seriously? It's been running on the BBC for about 4 years. So long, in fact, that it's also now on Gold.

 

Ha! I’m generally behind with most TV shows and Netflix series etc. Yeah, never heard of it before. Going to look it up in a bit.

 

It's not bad. Not as good as Blackadder, though.

 

I just had a look and all 3 series are on iPlayer. Was hoping for news on a 4th series but looks like they may be turning it into a stage show instead.

 

Perhaps he's a "Made Man" as they say in the Mafia

 

Can't improve on perfection.