Diary of a COG aged 50 and 3/4 - Get up at 9am on matchday excited for the day ahead. - 10 am have bowl of Golden Grahams in WFC pyjamas I got for Xmas from Santa. - 11am have shower with Harry the Hornet shower gel and get dressed in full Watford kit with new boots and shin pads. - 12 pm watch midday game whilst meditating upon possible team selections for Watfords game. - 1pm read WFC forums, get midly depressed by the Negativatrons peppering the forum with their doomsday predictions. - 1.30pm relieve mild depression by rewatching great Watford moments on YT. - 2 pm review team selection, revisit forums and get mildy depressed again by the Negativatrons histrionics because such and such player was/wasnt picked. - 2.30pm crack open first drink of the day. Mild depression relieved. - 3-5 pm watch game and experience full gamut of emotions from frustration to optimism, dissapointment to elation. - 5pm have celebratory/consolation drink. - 6pm Look forward to next game with hope and enthusiasm. Repeat ad infinitum. Die happy in the knowledge Ive lived a life of positivity, hope, enthusiasm and optimism.
We could simplify things, we could have COGs (Cult of Gino) vs CONs (Cult of Nath) Each game could be like general election night, lose = CON Hold.
Similar but more OCD with regard to lucky yellow underwear and varying degrees of yellow and black tennis apparel. No drink,other than tea if we've won or drawn.
After last season's 'championship at best' moniker, im looking forward to the 1st bedwetter labelling a player 'league 1 at best'. looking at our broadly premier league squad I'm wondering who that's gonna be. Also hoping for some more exotic insults 'Afghan league 2 at best' 'Bolivian sunday league at best'. Disclaimer 'broadly premier league squad' doesn't equate to promotion. We all know a lot more ducks have to line up for that to happen. Just renewed my COG subscription, got a great deal from Moog that included an annual membership of this forum for just £499.
Where have you been? Half our bench on Friday would be well out of their depth in League 1. Not sure Chalobah even looks like a professional at any level nowadays.
You forgot 7pm Log on to the forum and get mild depression regardless of result due to all the Negativatrons complaining x chance wasn't taken or x player couldn't defend
The 14 who played were all championship/premier league level and on top of that Masina Caps Hughes TDB Sarr Perica Gray Deeney Success were unavailable. All of them are championship/PL quality. The unused subs haven't played enough for us to make a clear cut decision either way but you're right most likely some aren't championship quality, if so they probably won't play this season. Apart from Bachmann they were only on the bench due to the high number of absentees. Gino and his stooges made some terrible decisions last season but they've left us with a fantastic squad for this season. Credit where credit's due. If the transfer linked players like Caps Deeney and Sarr work as hard as the committed players have in the 1st 5 games we should b top 6 at least. Football is never that straightforward but the time for the plastic bedsheets is over for now. Im going with finest Egyptian cotton.
Bed wetters can’t see shades of grey, unfortunately. Something to do with the years worth of ammonia seeping into their eyes.
I'm still not certain what a "cog" is, and I can't believe it is what Skyla and HH24 were discussing so I looked it up in football context and mystery solved - it's an integral part of one of these;
just in case anyone is wondering, as it confused me for a while too, Cult Of Gino is that spikey bit of wood in that there rattle.
Is a COG different or more or less the same thing as a mushroom? We used to have those around. Is there a Venn diagram that shows the overlap between Mushrooms, COGs and Happy Clappers? Are people allowed to move between groups? That is, is it allowable to be somewhat satisified with things temporarily, or must a person be all in - you know, skip back and forth to to the park each day whilst singing the praises of our strikers? As for the Cult of Nath... are there temporary memberships, that is, can one just rage tweet for a while, then go to a bonfire and torch ritual or something? Or must one actually behead a person whilst blaming them for all societal ills and then drink the tasty "kool-aid punch" with the arsenic chaser? It's so muddled and gray. I need this to be black and white. Please sort it out for me.
Mushroom - now there's a term I've not heard for a long time. I believe a clapper is what the youth of today call them.
Love it. Cult of Nath or CON! That'll teach those stupid bedwetters. Doesn't make our side of the argument look as petty as we've accused them of being at all. If they want to come up with a fair description of a subset of supporters we will do the same. Despite the fact that the bedwetters all don't agree with each other. That doesn't matter at all. Although was it Nath that started it or Moog? The Cult Of Moog. COM's everywhere when we lose.
On the horns of a dilemma now. On my return home from my morning lesson,what my Mother quaintly referred to as my "Tuesday Ladies" I had a sneezing fit. This resulted in a small amount of wee escaping from my bladder. Do I now need to change camps to the "Bedwetters" (even though I was vertical) as well as underwear?! Oh the shame of it! I Blame Bassett,in the armchair, humming a Vera Lynn tune,aged 127.